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Seneschal Glorfindel of Rivendell (goldenelf) wrote,
@ 2003-03-07 09:59:00
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    Current mood:traumatized

    Worst Day of this Age
    I'll start with the only thing that saved my sanity. Elladan and I went orc hunting. Prince Legolas and Elrohir wanted to go, too, but the Evenstar required Legolas by her side to finalized the seating arrangements for the wedding reception and Elrohir couldn't come because he is "sick." Had a fabulous time. Bathed in the blood of orcs. I was quite impressed my Elladan's skill at drawing out the kill. Very nice.

    But even the fun of an orc slaughter couldn't save me from what happened later. I accompanied several other elves, hobbits, and men to Estel's poetry reading. First let me say that all the reports of Estel's "home" are true. The lowest dungeon in Mordor has more to recommend it than that sty Estel is living in. The mural is... beyond belief. I just thank my luck stars that I am nowhere depicted in it. Estel did appear to have made some effort to clean the place up somewhat, and I'd already sent in my men earlier to take away the dead body, but still... I swear, the shadows at the corners of the room CRAWLED. Something slimey and cold dripped down from the ceiling and fell down my shirt. *shudders* Elladan was right, instead of whiskey I should have taken disinfectant. However, the whiskey did at least hold me there. But then... then... THE POETRY! The less said about that, the better. I managed to make my escape early on, but I think some people were too lethargic due to Mr. Took's housewarming gift of particularly strong pipeweed to make their escapes.

    After a LOOOOOOOOOOONG bath and some anti-nausea medication, I still needed to calm my nerves somewhat, so I spent a few hours grooming Asfaloth. Its a soothing activity. However, my nerves were shattered late in the night by a horrifying hobbit scream. I ran to Mr. Baggins's quarters, sure that someone was being murdered and found a hysterically sobbing hobbit, a completely stoned hobbit, a glassy-eyed elf (I think Elladan was still recovering from Estel's poetry), and two more hobbits falling down drunk. Samwise Gamgee had apparently ingested several of Mr. Took's shrooms and was having hallucinations. He kept shouting at Frodo Baggins, something like "how COULD you!?!" and something about Gollum. His hallucinations seemed particularly nightmarish. Merry Brandybuck was asleep (and snoring frightfully) under Frodo's bed and Mr. Baggisns himself was curled around a bottle of spirits in a fetal position on top of the bed. Elladan and Pippin Took were sharing a pipe in the corner of the room, ignoring everyone else, and perusing some books (I think they were looking at the pictures of naked people performing magic rituals).

    I couldn't deal with it. I may have faced down a balrog, but I am in no way equiped to handle hallucinating and stoned hobbits. Right now I feel the need for a long frolic AWAY from Imladris! Lady Galadriel, Lord Celeborn, would you care to accompany me?



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elf_man
2003-03-07 21:31 (link)
i hate to tell you this, old friend, but you most certainally ARE in that mural... I will not spoil the surprise of how you are to come to your Orc fighting end, but it is what would be expected from the abyss that Estel has the gall to call his mind...

between us, the highlight of my evening was realising that Estel had somehow mistaken some old kitchen sponges (tho what he was doing with a cleaning utensil) for tofu and had served that to people on skewers... he shall make a wonderful little wifey someday... *smirks* i could not prevent my laughter as i watched celeborn attempt to eat it! oh i was in stitches, everyday I am more so convinced that Estel is an evil genius as opposed to simply being a madman.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


goldenelf
2003-03-08 12:59 (link)
No no, that blond elf with the arrows through each eye and tears of blood was HALDIR, not me! Really. I wasn't in the mural.

everyday I am more so convinced that Estel is an evil genius as opposed to simply being a madman.
You may have something there, lad.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re:
elf_man
2003-03-08 13:09 (link)
sorry to break it to you, but haldir was another blonde elf... he was stabbed by an Orc, whereas you were impaled on spikes thru your genitals...

and FYI i saw estel go into eomers bedchamber... he looked off his head on the poppy and more than a little distressed!

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goldenelf
2003-03-08 14:25 (link)
you were impaled on spikes thru your genitals...
So I've been told. *sniff* I don't, however, see the resemblance at ALL!

he looked off his head on the poppy and more than a little distressed!
So, he looked normal then?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re:
elf_man
2003-03-08 20:51 (link)
*snort*

yes, but withEomer?

ahhhh the soap opera that is Estel, i shall never need cable TV again...

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


king_elessar
2003-03-07 22:04 (link)
I will say no more than that you have hurt and offended me, dear friend.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


goldenelf
2003-03-08 13:02 (link)
I am sorry that you feel offended, Estel. I'm just not a poetry person, never have been. I'm sure that someone more receptive to verse would LOVE your poetry, but I am just not that person. And as for your pad... surely even you can see that it is not up to the standards of cleanliness that most people find comfortabe?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re:
king_elessar
2003-03-08 13:12 (link)
i tried VERY hard to clean it, and everything, I did my BEST.

we dont have any warm water or power you know, only a broken pipeline and tap... its hard to clean...

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


c_hunnie_bunnie
2003-03-08 23:41 (link)
Oooooo!!! Glorfindel!! I love Glorfindel!

hehe.. ummm... sorry, I don't even remember how I found you now... ¬_¬;;;; I think on Interest search... hehe

(Reply to this) (Thread)


goldenelf
2003-03-09 11:24 (link)
Why, THANK YOU, dear lady! You are a woman of eminent tastes. LOVE your icon, by the way. Yes, I am quite sexy, aren't I? *preens* Do feel free to look at my "Friends" list to see what has been going on in my life since the War of the Ring.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


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