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Enraged (enragedbeauty13) wrote,
@ 2003-04-30 17:41:00
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    Current mood: pensive
    Current music:Aerosmith - Dream on

    "every time that i look in the mirror...."
    all these lines on my face gettin' clearer....the past is gone...

    Absolutely love this's just classic Aerosmith at it's best.....
    the only thing that just makes me a bit "grr" about this song is that now that eminem used it, everytime i hear his rap song play, i think it's this song...
    he can just piss me off sometimes...

    so why did i start this journal?
    well, frankly, someone hacked into my UJ account by some strange miracle of god...and all my entries are gone...
    oh how joyous!

    so what is currently going on in my life?
    well....a lot!
    I've met this great guy named Chris....
    he's just great.
    he's smart(major turn on for me), funny, cute, sweet, and loves the same music as i do.
    what more could i ask for?

    so, how did i meet him.
    i met him in person a week ago on friday....
    he met christina, a close friend of mine online and i basically accompanied her to meet him.
    here's where it gets messy...
    turns out he likes both chrissy and me, but he feels that he and i click better.
    he then asks how i felt, and i really wasn't gunna lie...i don't like lie about what i really feel..
    and well....i felt the same...that he and i "clicked"
    that, and as much as i wanted to ignore the way i felt because of christina...i couldn't :/
    i was extremely intrigued by him.
    so i told christina the truth, and so did he...
    things won't be the same for a while, and she doesn't hate me, she's jsut mainly upset that she's gone through this with another friend of ours, and now she's going through it again..

    now you all think i'm shit.
    don't blame you...
    but i've never been "first" on my list, i've always placed myself last...
    and i at least want to try and be happy with chris, if not i'll always be left wondering what could have been.

    Angel, i hope you're reading....i need some support..and if u don't support it, i understand.
    i hope i get to talk to you soon, i miss talking to you friend in law!
    i'm glad things are better with you and Jenn....i wanna hear more about this chick, give me a call..
    u have my cell number i hope.

    well people....i guess i'm done for today...
    later for now...

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2003-05-01 03:36 (link)
hey hey:P well, funny thing is that i've been thinking about u lately. what youve been up to... if youre alright... things of that nature. and ofcourse i miss talking to you too. well, right now its 3:30am.. just up here listening to some techno. guess im in the mood for it, ehhh. anywho, as to your situation... what am i here to support or not? you were honest about things and you've got to know what u can and cant get into. sometimes things seem extremely tempting... oh it seems great and all but is it really? are somethings worth that risk? i dunno, hun..
things with Jenn and i are going great. we got into something that really questioned our relationship but we overcame it and now we're alot stronger together. damn, im tired, lol. if steve hasnt told u , we've been workin out everymorning for the past month. just thinkin about it tires me. oh, i deleted my other s/n's... due to the events that occured i felt i needed to start anew. my new s/n's th3darkness187... AND , my girl has the password (something to do with the trust issue). so, never mention anything of callin or things of that nature, lol. if she ever asks who it is, just tell her straight up, you're steve's ex, my friend.. u know, friend in law, lol. ugh, i feel like such a moron for telling u all this but i just wanna avoid any bullshit with her.
anyway, it was great hearing from u , Kell. hopefully , we'll chat soon... xoxoxoxo


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2003-05-01 15:59 (link)
i commented on urs...bored i guess ;)
thats really great...
yeah i know, big risk...
it's just sigh...
he and i are just going to keep it cool...go with the flow of things...and get to know one another first...
oh it's no problem with Jenn...i won't mention it.
ugh..."Steve's Ex"
that just made me cringe...hate the sound of that.
but hey, it's the truth....sadly i guess.
shit happens.
talk to u soon..
SweetTremere is my newest s/n...
when are you having your own place? i read something about it...
yeah...if i come over.....shot glass and kettle one vodka waiting for me
talk to u soon!

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