|Current mood:|| indescribable|
for new years I got to babysit ..wich made me happy. i love being with those little kids. And i finally got to babysit the itty bitty one...she is almost 2 months old now...wich was alot of fun..I got braces yesterday...woo hoo..not..its okay..i cant really chew. umm...my parents got me a hot tub for christmas..:S.(i didnt really want one..but okay).i dont know why..they say "i wish you were happy..what did we do to make you unhappy?! talk to us" and ..just maybe i dont want to talk to ya'll..i want to keep it to myself...why don't they get that! well..my dad does..my mom is far from understanding that. I've never talked to my family about my personal stuff. I dont feel comfortable talking to them! and everytime i am sad..its a horriable sin if i dont tell her what is wrong. or if i get mad at her its a crime. i mean, i have feelings too mom. she never thought that maybe its my own decision that i am unhappy. its my own fault. yet.. i HAVE to be happy around her. its not your fault mom! its my own...stop trying to change me...