Days like today make me hate myself.
When does familial obligation end? I'm so tired of being used, and abused. Can you believe, I was actually told, actually TOLD "If I was more of a cruel person I'd have severely beaten your ass by now.."
*sigh* Really? I pay everything. Everything. I don't want to be here any more than you want me here. I didn't want this - just like you didn't.
Yet you consistently bite the hand that feeds,
and yet I consistently stay
Because you have no one else.
Your other two children turned their back on you a long time ago.
So I've been pacing the past couple of hours, wondering if it's going to end like it did last time. You punched me in the mouth, and I walked away for 2 years.
Today wasn't supposed to be this way.
Today was supposed to be a good day.
I had gone to the doctor and gotten better antibiotics. All my labwork came back normal. And Steve sent so many love - filled messages I felt happy despite being sick.
..I just want it to end.
|© 2002-2008. Blurty Journal. All rights reserved.|