| Current music: | the wallflowers-one headlight |
what an awsome week. kennedy gave me my own small little show every thursday on ccn, school house talks, i tried out and made the tex-ann hip hop routine for this weeks pep rally, my driving stuff finally came in the mail, i got my tex-ann pictures, and then i got to hang out with my friends at the lock in and then i got to go to the drumline competition and see them get best snare and best bass line and 1st place 1st division and i was just really happy. i felt like i could do whatever i wanted to, and that i could be happy on my own. my heart is still recovering, but i opened my eyes and saw that he cant break me. "no one can make you feel inferior without your consent" i think eleanor rosevelt (spelling)said that. well, i love him, but Joel was right. i dont want to be with him like that. why do i care if he doesnt love me? in my heart, i will always love the guy who i played tackle football with on cold autumn nights in his backyard, and who told me he loved me in the courtyard and held my hand, and who i laughed with when we wrestled and who was my best friend. what do we have in this life besides time and memories? well, im going to take the year that i sent with him, and remember it forever, because they were good times. im not going to let anyone take this from me and im not going to be bitter and give up on love just because it ended. because really, in the end, its all ok, and if its not ok, then its not the end. i can live without him, but i will never forget him.
just know that after friday, ill miss you, and i wish it didnt have to be this way.
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