|Current music:||Suicide Comando~HellRaiser|
Ah yes so it has been awhile since I have updated. Indeed... and I had a long month of chaos in Las Vegas. Things have settled except for a few nerve endings. My sister is doing better and she is up here with me and my family with the nephew I love and adore. We are going to smother her with love and get her in to see th best doctor here... because the doctors in las vegas sit on their asses without doing their job not even calling people back.. which... pissed me off to no end. Al is well.. long drive... got some drawing in which was good.. I really should rea dmore than I have been. I am glad to be home and snuggle with my cats and be in my room. I have yet to let the rats out and give them some running time. Rachille is officially engaged and tomarrow I am going out with her to celebrate. I have not seen her in 4 months... it will be good to see her. So after tomarrow I am going to take some " me " time and paint. A lot of thinking to be done as well. I have been writing in my Biography and find it easier than I thought. No emotional break downs... it was slightly hard to write about my ex,... unfortunatly he has a vital life lesson in the book... it is not really enjoyable to know one of the most beautiful creatures shit themselves away. Oh well... at least it has given me time to know I needed time alone.. I have been growing and learning more.. it is nice without the bullshit... maybe this time I will find someone deeper than that. one day.... but so the writnig continues and I have made it very far which is amazing. I seriously thought I was going to die when I turned 19 but I am glad I am alive.. Anywho.. this is getting depressing... too much for me because I am in a very good mood right now :) I FINALLY got Moon Child and I am SO excited.. that movie speaks to me... ( THANK YOU SETH AND JULIYA ) ..... I reminds me of Val and I... gowing through the growing up period... gaining close friends and losing them... knowing we will always have each other no matter what. I Still cry when I see the end... I can't help it... it hurts because I try not to cry in front of people... The movie was splendid and I enjoyed it so much... I am going to make my parents watch it ~grin~ So many movies to buy.. so little time... So I made my New years resolution and it is a few things. To eat better... lay off the soda... been drinking tea... yumm... and be more active... I am also going to finish my studies and re learn Spanish and probably a few others... I have been leaning tawards Arabic and japanese... I want to understand these movies without having to read subtitles one day and well Seth.. you and juliya got me into it... I would love to also learn Aramaic one day... that would be so fucking fantastic. maybe many more but for now I will stick to those three for this time. A lot of learning for my mind. It has been so hungry and I am trying to feed it. I am going to try like hell to learn Piano... and it will give me time to spend with my grandmother and learn one of her skills to keep with me forever. I love her very much and I want to carry that with me so when I play it will be for her. I have always loved music and felt a little frustrated I did not have the talent for it... but maybe I need to be in love with an instrament first and I am with the Violin and piano... but I ant to try the piano... revamp my singing skills because they are shot to shit right now... so many things I want to do and I am not going to waste time. I have so many things I want to do.. this life is fil;led with oportunities I did not know I had and I am going to try like hell. This world is changing... I can tell from the Tsunami dissaster... I cried... it hurt so bad.. I wanted to do so much... and I want to help... help peopl ehere too.. we had floods in nevada and california... so much is going on... I can only hold onto hope that a better life is coming. That is what My Grandma said... she said that "Spirit " is watching and now things are going to change for the good,... I dunno because when my grandmother says things like that they're usualy true....it's weird... I heard that same thing from Andrea's family when I was in Ohio... things are changing but for the good... I hope this is true... I can't bare destruction when there is so much life... I just hope those who died are safe and in a better world... I will paint a picture of "Hope" for the Tsunami surviviors... and send it over to them... maybe it will give them hope... I can express so much in painting... that is one of my goals....I want to give hope to others who have none.
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