Ourizeth (celestial_moon) wrote, @ 2005-02-12 15:08:00

Current mood:	relaxed
Current music:	Bright Lights- Billy Crawford

the old feeling...the old me
Another person that I became close with will leave the country this week....It seems the past few years in my life people come and go like a revolving door. If it is death visiting my relatives it could be the same ol phrase "I'm leaving the country...." No wonder I am used with the same scenario like it is just a never ending cycle. No wonder I am not that too chummy, I have this wall that they interpret as I am intimidating. It is like the Adlerian theory that one's personality could have been influenced by past relationships with significant people. I believe it is only that I am so at ease with myself. I have flaws so who cares?

I spend a day with her as we both stared at a big serving of noodles, started talking about certain mumbo jumbo about random people at work. Alas, the topic of being contented been opened up I never even saw it coming. Flashes just came to me of persons who I encounter telling me of their ambitions in life. Most of them are telling about what the future will be for them...it annoys me if they could either feel worthless or so damn futuristic they even plan how to die with lotsa money. My friend just made me realize I am not thinking like a 22 year old happy-go-lucky girl that I am but a 27 year old gutsy woman who just suddenly realize that it is just a matter of being contented that will make people truly happy. At that moment it felt I am talking to myself, it just felt weird. I had always been happy when I was a little girl and the same old feeling just comes back day by day.

Right now all I can do is just wish her luck.... As for me, I'll continue what I do best just enjoy every day that comes by. Have a good breakfast, go to work early, have a reason for ending the shift right, wander in a mall, go home with a pasalubong, watch couple of fav shows/movies, take Zs and good dream. If i'm not enjoying the same routine hehehehe insert some of my favorite rituals.

	br0wn_c0w 2005-02-12 12:35 (link)
	*sigh* It's really sad when people leave.... (Reply to this) (Thread)

	hexen_dia_yuvel 2005-02-12 23:57 (link)
	Sigh, I guess that's one area that I have to work on myself. I have nothing to ask for really but lately I'm consumed with this argh feeling T___T (Reply to this) (Thread)

	presea 2005-02-16 06:00 (link)
	i know this is an OT post but heck.. bakla!!! *pokes* it's been a while since i was last here. kita-kits naman with hexen_dia_yuvel!!! tagal na kitang di nakikita! (Reply to this) (Thread)