this is worse i think, i just feel so bad for her, i never wanted to make her feel this way, ever. i really didn't i just don't know whats going on with me. i don't know what i want. apparently i wanted her to go away and she has and it sucks. i wish i could be what she needed i just don't know if i can and i don't know why i just hate it. i hate that i've caused this and i'm not even really sure how. i think i'm scared scared of hurting her or myself again. ironically i've just hurt her the worst and that sucks. i just have to know that it was the right thing to do i guess. i don't know i don't want her holding on if theres nothing to hold on to. i don't know whats happened. i guess we just both have to let it go, i don't know. this sucks. i'm terribly sorry.
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