ursula (buffalogal) wrote, @ 2003-08-10 14:53:00

Current mood:	awake
Current music:	silence

blowing a stranger
the last time i wrote here i told greggie (can i call you greggie?) that i would light up a cigarette - finally - after five months of abstinence. and so i did. i thought it would be an orgasmic experience but it wasn't at all. holding the cigarette between my fingers, lighting it up, putting it between my lips, sucking the poison in - those were all familiar and welcome to me. it was like putting on skin that i had shed before.

but then when i dragged in the smoke into my system and i tasted it in my mouth - it was like meeting a stranger. it was such a jarring experience for someone who loves to smoke. serves me right for dropping it in the first place.

anyway i smoked about four more after that because i wanted to get it back - my love affair with nicotine.
but i didn't succeed. something's different. some of the magic is gone. now i can afford to go back to not smoking again. and it's so sad.

	xander6464 2003-08-12 04:27 (link)
	Of course you can call me Greggie! I love the way you personified nicotine! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: buffalogal 2003-08-12 13:05 (link)
	okay greggie : ) anyway nicotine and i have kissed and made up so i'm happy relatively (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	xander6464 2003-08-14 18:04 (link)
	Good.....now tell us whatever you can about the new show. I know a lot of it is probably a secret but if there are any details you can give, give them:) (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)