|Current mood:|| blank|
i have kind of a lot i want to talk about now... i like college, how much i like it depends on how many new people i talk to that day, i met a lot today kinda. and i love lindsey (giblin not myself) i think things are working out well. i talked to my dad this evening, and he said vkvs losing five of their members, and i was so sad, cuz i dont want them to break up. i was upset for awhile, then david signed on a little later, and he imed me first (woah) and we were talking about labels and stuff and how we both wanted to start one and hes like oh we should do it together, and i concured. and he said that theyre staying together and theyre losing four members. and marlons staying, and thats all that matters, i like david, hes a cool guy, but the band would be nothing without marlon. hes the most interesting person ever. i like him so much. but not like that. i saw matt (who i am gonna marry, from the starranch party) today and now i love him even more because he was walking around with a guitar case. hes perfect. nicest guy ever soo hott (in my opinion) smart, and music too?? he must be flawed elisa must be right, he must not be into girls. i think im getting woosey i had some, i dont know how much alcohol earlier, lindsey and shane said it would help me sleep, but i cant. shane just left like 10 minutes ago, but im not even tired. i have class at 11, i have a quiz, i hope i do okay, i didnt study, but its like stuff ive been doing since 7th grade so i hope im okay. toms my favorite person in that class. and weezer boy with a fat girlfriend. hes fun too. oh and theres this guy names matt, whos like the boy version of me. we were in the same group today, and he was SO much fun. i like me haha. but i like tom the best cuz hes pretty cute and hes quite, and i like quite people. they intrigue me. i was about to say opposites attract, but they dont like me i just like them. this used to depress me, but for some reason im now okay that no guys i like like me. i still like james a lot that was in my music class for the one day i was in it. im looking cute when i go over there to talk to the teacher tomorrow. cuz i liked him and the guy in front of me that i didnt talk to. that guy was effing hott man. anywyas, and today i had lunch with sara who was bothering me cuz shes always kinda gay when things with her and eric are good, and she said they did it 3 times in one night the night he came back and again in the morning. i wish she wouldnt tlel me about that stuff with other people its not wierd, but with her it freaks me out for some reason. but yeah so she had class and i was going to go to the bookstore just to look cuz ive seen people wearing those comfy skirts that are from u of a and i wanted to get one, but on the way there i saw brenden (one of joshes friends) and two other guys, i think the one from huntington was named matt or david maybe?... and i hung out with them for like an hour, we played hangman in a classroom in the chem building. it was kinda fun, brenden was really nice still, he reminds me of brian weed, and matt or derek or whatever his name is was my favorite, partially because he was from huntington, but i told him my room # and stuff, i dunno if ill seem him again though. then, i started thinking about new york david again today, i want to call him, but its been long enough, that he might not remember me, and i dont know what to say... ive got nothing besides edgefest and theres still awhile till that. i gues i could say our car is filling up, and i was wondering if i need to save him a spot or not. thats good. i think i might do it cuz he was so hott. and i always look bad w hen i see him. damnit. then we played with hunt again, and i thought he might have been into one of us, but some lizzie girl kept calling him during class so i was obviously wrong. josh stopped calling. (oh dear) haha. i saw him outside of our dorm last night when linds and i were going somewhere but i didnt say anything and he knew i saw him. i talked to chris the other night, he asked if i still wanted lessons, damn him for getting around to it too late. its better this way though, because i neever would have gotten over him any other wya. i spent a year of my life in love with him, and got nowhere, that was long enough. im going to do the same with matt. hes going to break my heart, or never give me the time of day, and cant tell which yet, but im open to exploration. but yeah he was nice. i still think hes a good guy, i dont think i want to let go of that, just because he, matt and brian are the only truly nice guys i can think of. shanes really nice too. i cant think of any others. thats kind of depressing. i cant think of a lot of good people in general, thats why raok's excite me soo soo much. oh okay so lindsey and i did laundry (it was my frist time) and we this card game (cant remember what its called right now) and every person that walked in *all coincidently were guys* i asked if they wanted to play too. the first one was nice, but i cant rememeber if i asked and he declined or i didnt ask because he was done, the second one mark or mike i cant remember was cute, and said he would be back and the third one was totally interested, but we were already in a game, sooooo he didnt play, but he sat down and cute one came back and sat down by us too. and like we started talking about looks and okay, this convorsation kind of bothered me. he was saying (cute mike or mark) that people always care what you look like and get ready and stuff and lindsey and i started laughing saying people dont care what you look like here. and they told us that there is no way that is true. and hes like yeah potential friends and mates or i dont know what else to call them, were everywhere, and they all are judging you based on how you look and how you are dressed. i didnt like that he said that. i wear like band shirts and pajama shorts to class... so i guess it kind of offended me, saying that if i tried harder more people would like me, or poeple dont like me cuz i dont try hard enough. i dont know if there is much of a distance between those two statements. anyway so he said he was from norcal, so i asked if he liked kgb. hes like thats so random ive never met anyone else that knows them, blah blah blah, and so we started talking about other stuff, and i asked if indie rock was his thing, he said yes so i got excited and almost peed like a little puppy. and so we talked about other bands and i told him how i worked at a label, and then he finally asked my name, and told me his, like he didnt care until this point. which kind of bothered me, but kind of cool that i got him to the point of caring too. so then i told him about edgefest and how sara and i were going and we had an empty car, and hes like is that an invatation i said if he wanted to get a ticket, he was welcome to come, and he was like id love to, and i told him where i got it and price and stuff, so then i gave him my number, and well see what happens. he was pretty cute, but he said hella, which i HATE that and yall i hate those two words more than any others. ycuk. he had piercing and stuff which i like. no tats. oh and when i was walking home todya, i saw the hottest guy sitting out on the steps of the hopi dorm or something and we kept looking at each other and kinda smiling a little more each time we made eye contact, the finally i said hi, and he smiled and said hi too. i wish i would have stopped. dude he was hott. im goign to try to sleep i have an 11 oclock class tomorrow and i need to go early for help. goodnight. i wish i knew david better. i always hope well start talking more. i imed him at lunch and he said nothing to me, so maybe thats why he imed me later? then he imed me again and just said he was going to sleep and maybe tlak tomorrow, i wanna hear the story, on this girl abroad, i dunno if its a girlfriend or intrest dad didnt know, but i wanna hear. i doubt ill get it out of him. but hey its worth a try. i wish marlon would just effing sign on, im having withdrawls, i havent met anyone as interesting as him, ever. i thought i would meet more interesting people in college, and i havent really. its just fun to talk to people the first couple times till they get boring. i like lindsye a lot more than i thought i would.s hes so much fun. dude marlon com eto me. his mind is amazing. i hope hes not like cassandra... like acting one way like oh i have no feelings but really does, or oh i dont care but hten actually do. i dont think he is, i would cry if i found out he was. i want to know him more.
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