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| Current music: | The Fray-Look After You |
Dear Lover....
Why don't you notice me anymore, you don't look at me the same. I don't see that love you use to have for me like you did when I use to look into your eyes. I get this sense of an unemotional look. You look straight through me...why? You bitch about how long it takes me to get dressed...I just want to look nice for you. Hurry up hurry up! Thats all I hear...I am taking my time but rushing just so I can look nice for you. Now!...I don't get a compliment anymore. What was it that I had that drove you crazy when we first became a couple? What is that I don't have anymore that makes you not even want me? You don't touch me, you don't care to touch me, you don't even look at me that way anymore. You said its not important...you could go on in life forever without ever being intimate with me. Wow! Talk about straight to the heart. I try to do everything to make you notice me. Sad that I am your wife and you quit noticing that I exist. You don't care to cuddle anymore, or kiss me like you use to. I initiate every single time we even touch...I have to grab your hand, I have to go up to you and kiss you, I have to pull you close to me to cuddle. What happened to us? Its like we're full-time friends and part-time lovers....seriously what the f happened? I miss you terribly and you don't even see it. I have changed my hair style day after day thinking what will catch her eye. I try to make my makeup look prettier than ever everyday and you still don't notice. You never tell me I'm pretty anymore and I have yet to hear you tell me that I am beautiful. You told today that I didn't need to take forever to get dressed and I didn't need to get all dolled up because who was I going to impress.....NO-ONE...because you said I don't need to impress you. WTF!?!?! I am losing myself within and I am losing my beauty...I have been careless for the past couple of years, I don't care about myself anymore and for once I have been and I have been trying to get you to notice me but nothing seems to work. I just want you to say hey...you look pretty..or you are really beautiful...maybe even your hair looks nice...I like the way you did your makeup. NO! I hear....yeah that looks nice...are you wearing your hair like that?....what did you do to your eyes?...ugh!!! I am trying so hard not to break down emotionally and mentally! I don't want to act like friends anymore...I married you and I am your wife but I don't feel like it. You walk in and don't even say hi..how are you..how was your day?..how was work?...no kiss no hug...only when you leave...but when you come home...you just seem to walk by me. We don't have romantic nights nor romantic dinners. Everything faded...everything seems to be gone. I on the other hand feel everything the same for you. You may think I don't but how do I show my feelings and emotions towards someone who has completely shut me out. I can't sit there and show you affection physically because you are frustrated and don't want to be touched or bothered. I can't grab you and pull you close for a passionate kiss because all I get are pecks on the lips or cheeks. We don't make love anymore...we're like an old couple that has lost their mojo for love making. Call me a nympho but I am not. I just miss you, I miss all of you! I don't know what else I have to do to make you just notice me again like you use to. Now a days I just annoy you or aggravate you. I can't seem to get anything right...everything I do is wrong. I get all dressed up and you tell me over and over to hurry up and just throw on my makeup and do my hair already. Yeah who am I suppose to impress....wish I impressed you! What do I have to do to make you see that I am madly in love with you even though you may not feel the same anymore. I know you love me...but I just don't have that spark that you once saw in me like in the beginning. Where did is all go.....why did it have to take you with it. You know I miss how you use to stare at me....you'd smile and just stare...you'd even use to tell me that I'm pretty or beautiful...or how happy I make you. Now you tell me...ughhhhh you frustrate the hell out of me. But in the end...its going to be my fault and its going to be because I didn't see all the reason why it ended up this way and because I should have...right!?!?! All I want you to do is love me and quit treating me like a child....sometimes.....sometimes I....nah nevermind...
Why though? Why all this?
Love the one that wishes you would notice her....
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