holy shit its an update
Danngg I havent updated this thing in like months. Oh well nobody reads it anyways. Alot has happened, more drama (fucking duhh) blah blah.. Anne is still in the picture somehow, she's in california right now with Joni doing god knows what.. yes there is current drama, its like George Bush.. relentless. Yeah George Bush owns up.. like maddox, he has by far the biggest set of nuts in the world, he does things his way and if you dont like it we'll make your country look like swiss cheese and take all of your natural resources. Anyways, lets talk about things that piss me off. Contrary to writing a book, I'll give you a brief summary. People who think they're better than me... guess what fuckers!! You arent.. you suck and thats sad. As a matter of fact, chances are if you are reading this right now.. yeah you, I am better than you at everything. I pulled a maddox today, someone pulled in front of me on the highway and fuckin cut me off.. so what do I do? Thats right, I pulled up beside them and rammed them off the road, I am better than you. Also things that piss me off are those people you give advice to.. and then they dont take it, and expect you to listen to them bitch about the subject. These people dont deserve to breathe, next time it happens to you.. which I know it does, I want you to backhand the fucker matrix style, and then give them a fucking horsekick to the throat and make them make you pie. Nothing is worthy of a tim allen grunt like a matrix style backhand, knuckles across they eyes backhand. Leaves a mark for days backhand. Hogh hogh hogh.. get er done
down there at the flea market
Ian lives with me now, you dont know who ian is but yeah he got in some trouble blah blah blah.. Im trying to make this entry long but its 3:30 in the morning, I just got done drinking and cooking chicken. My chicken is the best.. when ian cooks it he puts so much fucking lighter fluid in the fire that when you eat it, the lighter fluid vapors that have soaked into the chicken numb your tongue... literally, and that cant be good. I told you fuckers in the beginning that I would keep this thing, and never update one day and It would seem like I fell off the ends of the earth. Well I did just that.. kept floating, then I lit a huge ass fart and it flew me all the way back, and now here I sit. I still talk to some of my highschool friends.. the ones that Anne is friends with as welll. Goddamn the James Bond theme song is playing in the background and its pissing me off. James Bond gets more ass than I do (barely) and yeah thats not good. I figured out what rules, yawning.. amongst other things like blowing chunks on the floor and it smelling like liqour. These are things that rival only on the feeling of finding a crisp 20 dollar bill in the dryer. Yeah thats worthy of a Tim Allen grunt. My teacher used to tell me to live life like you only have 5 exclamation points... so that you dont overuse the ability to amplify emotion. But I took that theory, fucked it in the ass and watched some Home Improvement, now I live my life with only 5 tim allen grunts. Im listening to that brad paisly song about the whiskey lullaby. It rules, do download it. It makes me think about me and Anne, we got in another (yeah another) argument the other day, but its whatever.. I'll love her till the day I die and its sad. But hey hey hey we always have beer to cheer us up. Since Ian moved in, I cant think of a strech of 2 days where I have been completely sober. We buy more alcohol than we do gas... in gallons. Yeah its alot but it gets er done. My alcohol tolerance has tripled simply from hanging out with him. He didnt use to drink this much, I didnt either.. but I suppose you put us together and this is what happens. Over two years now, Anne.. Haha okay Im done with talking about her now I promise... you dont want to hear that, you want to hear about how much I rule. I took a poster of some NSync guy and put it on my door.. yeah I felt gay, till I took the stock of my rifle and put two big fucking holes in it, and sharpened my chinese star and threw it until it stuck not only on the front panel of the door, but through that with two blades sticking out the back panel, now he's fucked up. I say that as I listen to Allison Krauss now. I wonder how long this entry is gonna be when its shrunk more narrow.. Ian is making fire outside.. I can see the flames through the window, the crazy fuck. Yeah he almost got in a fight the other day, we were at a party and some big fat fuck was yelling so Ian couldnt go to sleep.. and everyone is throwed as hell and Ian wont take that from anybody.. so he gets all mad and starts telling the guy to shut up because he's trying to sleep. Now Ian puts out the fire. Im listening to Billy Joel. Its good to see corperate america take one in the ass by their employees.. you are wondering what the fuck im talking about. How best buy employees get car audio for 5% above factory cost, and when you know someone who works there you get them to buy all your shit and they do it because they know you'll roundhouse kick them in the spleen if they dont. Thats like a double fucking. I got mad at my dad the other night, now theres a bigass hole in the kitchen wall.. he pissed me off bad and I nailed it, I hit it hard.. it was a week ago maybe, my hand is still fucked up. I wish I was fucked up but Im going to bed now so I'll try to update more often, later.
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