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Christine (ab_imo_pectore) wrote,
@ 2005-08-07 14:08:00
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    Current mood: contemplative
    Current music:When in Rome - The Promise

    Here comes the girlfriend, all dressed in white
    Marriage is all around me these days. On TV, at work, with my friends, fucking internet pop-ups. It's everywhere.

    And it wouldn't bother me, if it weren't for the fact that I'm not getting married. I'm probably not getting married this year, or next year, or the year after that. Which is usually fine with me, because I want to be older. I want to have a career going for me, and I want to be financially stable enough to start a family. Right now I make $25 a game, and all of it is going towards my computer. I have thousands in grant money coming in mid-semester, but all of that is going to pay off my momma's car...so I can have it.

    When I get married I want it to be everything I have always dreamed of. If I do it now it won't be.

    But at the same time I want it. I want to be the wife and not the girlfriend. I want to have a husband, and a home, and a family. But its a matter of reality or wishes.

    I've proposed to Jon at LEAST a hundred times, and everytime he says "Someday".

    I don't know what I want. Sometimes I wake up with a "now or never" attitude. Other days I shake it off and realize I'm just anxious to get there.

    I dunno.

    I'll get there someday. Just like Jon says.

    ~Chris~



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(Anonymous)
2005-08-09 23:17 (link)
i know how you feel chris... but now its just a waiting game... -.-;

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