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v 2.0 - Meltdown (_sever) wrote,
@ 2004-01-16 18:56:00
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    Current mood: depressed

    Goodbye to you, goodbye to everything I knew..
    ok, i took some little quiz thing that was suppose to tell me what part of me was sexy, in hops to make myself feel a little better. i mean, there has to be something atleast remotely sexy about me, right? wrong, sorry olivia, no break for you. this is what i got:

    What Makes You Sexy? by eva71
    Sexy Body Part IsNothing
    Special Talents AreAbsolutely Nothing
    Created with quill18's MemeGen!

    ....yay for confidence boosters.

    i was looking through my old pictures today, and i cam across one of me and katherine. i've been thinking about her a lot. and how much i fucked everything up..again. we've had fights before, and we don't talk for awhile, but then we gradually start to talk again and it's like no one touches those wounds. i hate it because i feel like i'm the one who's always making them deeper, and i am. i'm inconsistant, unreliable, immature and selfish. and it's costing me the people that are dear to me. her birthday is coming soon, and i want to send her something to try to show her that i still need her, but it's like she doesn't want to talk to me. i guess apologies lose their meaning after you keep saying them. i am still sorry. and i will be for a long time. in a way i needed her, more than i could express. but i think i've finally lost her. she doesn't want my friendship anymore, and after everything i've done to her, i can't blame her. if i was her, i'd hate me too.

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2004-01-17 19:37 (link)
I just miss being a priority. I just miss you. I really.. miss me. I miss smiling. I'm the best God damn actress you'll ever meet, Liv.

I love you.. still

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2004-01-20 18:40 (link)
You're still a priority. I love you. You're a better person than I am, and I don't deserve you..and I'm scared that one day you're going to realize that.

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