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State Of Grace (_fuckedupkid) wrote,
@ 2004-01-08 16:35:00
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    Current mood: depressed

    So..I've been really out of it for the last week and half. Yesterday was one of the hardest days of my entire life. The memorial service was... so hard for me. I don't even want to talk about it at all, theres nothing more for to me say, I feel like theres nothing for me to do anymore at all. I can't explain these feelings that I'm having. I wish they'd go away, So that's why I'm leaving. I'm going to Mexico City for a week or so, Then I'm going to a town in southern california to see my brother and his wife. Hopefully I'll be able to go online. But I need to get away from everything. For the first time in my entire life I feel like I want to die. I hate it. I'm hurting so bad right now and there is nothing that anyone can do. I don't even know what to do for myself. Nothing makes sense to me at this point. Nothing. I miss Shannon too, a lot more than I thought I could miss anybody. I wish there was some way I could talk to her, if I had her address or phone number, something. I just need to hear from her...

    I need to go.

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