|Current mood:||johnny mar is god|
|Current music:||panic- the smiths|
assembly? what a joke, or, consumerism rises again
so today started out really well, i wore my red boots and everyone just kind of gushed at them when i got to school, lots of attention- 'you look stunning, doll' 'fabulous, fabulous, dahling, fabulous' i'm a whore for that, seeing as it only comes once every five or six YEARS, and all these people i didnt think knew my name all of a sudden appeared and wanted to hug me and 'like totally check out your shoes, babe.' i'm not supposed to like this, right? we depressed existentialist 'holier-than-thou-and-thy-crappy-music'-ers are supposed to keep to our small group of friends, avoid attracting attention. broke that one today. i'm so fucking sick of being judged by the fucking music i listen to-oh, i'm not worth talking to because i havent heard of the obscure '3rd wave ska/rock' band you just read an article about? FUCK YOU. i dont claim to be a
'knower of all things music,' nor do i care if i am. god, you listen to blues and you call yourself a punk? POSEUR. the hypocrisy of all my ideals and judgements is starting to surface and i wish it would just stay down so i could hate large groups of people freely and without questioning.
on a different note, i found 25 dollar VIA SPIGA shoes....miiiiiiine, all mine, come tomorrow. also getting some of nates uncles burberry shirts- yeah, so what if theyre a horrible preppy company that exploits children in malaysia, these shirts are fucking hot. also, tried on this neon pink versace peacoat, hows that for sexy.
another note on that: nate, who is 'stocky', black, with a really nice face and big lips and eyes who looks incredible in collared shirts and jeans, refuses to buy this beautiful black trench at the planet aid on newbury. its gorgeous, and he would look so fabulous in it, walking down the street. and also found him an armani tuxedo shirt w/ black ribbon around the collar and cuffs-20 BUCKS. he refuses. what is wrong with him, i ask.
alex ingraham called me last night, venting about lacrosse issues. i ALMOST felt bad for the guy.
my assignment for the week is to 'find all the parts about my body that i like,' according to my therapist. ah ha ha poor, poor me. pity me, damn you. i know where you live.
do you guys get really bad drymouth from the welbutrin? its driving me fucking insane, i have to pee every five seconds because im drinking so much water.
going out to massMOCA w/ a bunch of fun people next thursday, NO CLASSES, thank god, and i get to spend the night at nates.
'phone my family, tell 'em i'm lost on the sidewalk. no its not ok.'
read sylvia plaths 'poppies in a field' 'tis beautiful
guys, i can't do this routine anymore. methinks i'll go batty.
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nor i you. we need to do something about this. p.s. i'm jealous of everyone at gloucester high who has you when i dont|
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That's strange. I think you've very good taste in music. Oh yeah...let mte preface this by declaring that im drunk right now. I think I have the best taste known to music and your interests are very similiar to mine. Anyway..I just thought I think you should update more or osmething. I posted some pictures of myself on my journal if youre interested.|
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