|Current mood:|| depressed|
|Current music:||Morning Report With Mark & Steve, WOC AM 1420|
It's Friday, You Bastards
I'm not a bit surprised to see that Facebook is the most hated company in America (http://247wallst.com/2012/01/13/the-10-most-hated-companies-in-america/2/). It is the clunkiest, slowest, most aggravating and useless "service" ever invented. Then there is the complete disregard for privacy that makes Craig's List look like the safest place on the Internet...While still somehow protecting sensitive conservatives from nudity....but the really big issue is how they continually decide what the top stories are and when you tell them to forget that and just give them to you the most recent ones first, they somehow lose the recent ones and give you the ones that are 23 hours old first and when that defective system does manage to work right, it automatically switches back to Top Stories every-time you log in.
Yeah, Mark should be really proud that Facebook...Or as more and more people are calling it, MySpace Part II...beat out the big heavyweights like Best Buy, Goldman Sachs, Bank Of America, Nokia, Sears and American Airlines for the number one spot. When it comes to inciting hatred among their customers and shareholders, those guys don't mess around.
It's why I wish Rush Limbaugh would hire Mark as a consultant. Because he really let everyone down by coming in at #5 on the list of America’s Nine Most Damaged Brands (http://247wallst.com/2012/04/13/americas-nine-most-damaged-brands/3/). Not that you can accuse him of not trying. I mean, come on, just how many college kids do you have to call a slut and whore to make it to #1?
Keith Olbermann beat him for God's sake! And Keith doesn't even try to be obnoxious. So there must be some hidden tricky intricate political element involved that poor old Rush just can't master. That's why he needs help and if Mark were only an elderly self-loathing gay junkie it would be a 100% perfect match but you can't have everything.
What you can have is a drink because it's Friday night and while all the booze in the world won't make you forget how miserably Rush fails in his strongest suite, failure, it might take the edge off. Or at least make some of the girls here start exposing themselves. Most of them take birth control pills and you know what they say about girls like that.
So let's see what Fifi, my Sommelier, has cooked up for tonight's Theme Drink:
1/2 oz Amaretto
1/2 oz Bacardi 151 proof rum
6 oz Lager
Put Amaretto in bottom of shot glass, top with Rum. Pour Beer into glass. Light shot, pick up shot by the sides and drop entire shot glass (bottom first) into beer. When bottom of shot glass hits bottom of beer glass chug (the beer will put out the flame).
Don't have too many of them, though, because you don't want to end up like the Dutch government (http://worldnews.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/04/27/11433097-up-in-smoke-netherlands-aims-to-ban-foreigners-from-buying-pot?lite), which is so stoned that it thinks it's a good idea to kill it's tourism business. During a recession. You know, if Rush can't get what he needs from Mark, he can just move to The Hague.