|Current mood:|| discontent|
So few hours left in this life to change it all. Life is full of shameful endeavor, regrettable action we indulge in lack of judgement. To regret would be to admit wrong, and human nature would expose this oxymoron to its fullest extent. If I regret my mistakes, have I really learned anything, and if I have, then why are so many repeated? If I was truly lost inside myself forever, would anyone come looking to rescue me? And to my savior I meet at the gates of an non existant reality, would it be the one I had hoped to see? No, because to them I am a buried memory, left up to a match of insignificance. And I accept it. What other choice do I have? I live to mold, to grow and learn to be crafted as by which I experience and feel, to further myself from yesterday's incompetence and become the epitome of my will. To hold on to what I can't have would theoretically hinder me stagnant. We are what we are and to feel another so high as to make something still is absurd, in my regard. I wish I had the strength to honestly release it all, and move on respectively with my life figuratively a flower yet to bloom in it's greatest glory. I know I could never forget you, my heart would never allow it, but even if each breath inhaled is a wound to my soul, endured it will be. I believe I can survive on my own, and I believe I can emerge without you. Belief is a tricky thing, and to whether accredit it with such faith as to make the world around us, is debateable. I believe in belief. So strongly, in fact, if you truly believe in something, that you can do or accomplish your desire, you will. And I mean you really believe it, no questions of failure or lack of esteemed confidence. Because it will happen, you will succeed, and you will be where you wish. With a single tear, I will kiss your cheek in farewell, for you are a perfectly beautiful disease where I am dying. This may not be the first or last time I have said goodbye, for I'm sure I'll see you again, never stop feeling you, and you are forever apart of me. Smile at me and I know I have done right, regretting nothing except not holding you one last time.