|Current mood:|| rejected|
|Current music:||"Romeo A Go-Go" -Everytime I Die-|
...Until I Fight The Right Girl I Want To Be The Bad Guy..
These last two years have gone by rather slowly and girls have come and gone. I thought i made the choices i had made with my heart in mind, but with all that aside, i thought with the crotch more than i did the heart. I was a slave to the details and overlooked the big picture. Just the same with friends. It was more of a physical thing than an actual anything. Being that i tried to think i tried to pretend, i even cried when i was so frustrated not being able to actually know what i felt, i had someone else on my mind, and i so desperately wanted an answer to something that was complicated. And being that guy i am, having something physical at the time beat out emotion anyday, being that i was always the person to bullshit about what i felt or give some kind of sob teary eye story like i really cared, when i don't. I mean, i've heard from plenty of girls, about their ex's about how they have been cheated on, or they cheated on their ex's or maybe it just didn't work and their ex has some kind of delusional we'll get back together thoughts dwelling in the back of their mind. And how it bugged them to the point of border line hatred, or at least a physical form or something or other, it got really annoying to put up with after a while. Then again i am a prick and i put myself before everybody, who doesn't ? No you're a fucking liar don't even try to make a valid point. The only good relationship i did have was the first one, to which i ended up not knowing what to do and let it become something that relied more on the physical, or in other words, we'll just fuck until we don't know what to do anymore. Yeah my life was such a big joke. But why should you care? The other thing i wonder about to, why do so many people claim to be different yet dress the same as all these other different people? I'm just about the same as any other person, i shop at the same places, breathe the same air, drive and walk on the same streets. You're no different than anyone else no matter how distant you feel from people, because i myself feel that i don't belong, mostly because i don't want to belong. I've also grown very tired of whiny emo bands, espescially as of late. I plan to attend more HxC shows. Such as the All Out War show. Do any girls wanna go and make out with me during a shitty band? Just hollar at me. Lets look at my recent week.
2) Cat died
3) Grand parents are ill
4) Feel rejected
5) Slept alot all week
6) Really wanna work on the ...misplaced in csociety... CD
Going to go out with part of a conversation with my friend Ron.
Nightriderz2003 [10:31 PM]: tellem hes gotta go through ronnie fukin chambers 1st
XLetsStartOverXX [10:31 PM]: aight lol
Nightriderz2003 [10:31 PM]: im seriosu
Nightriderz2003 [10:31 PM]: tellem
Nightriderz2003 [10:31 PM]: ill break his legs
Nightriderz2003 [10:31 PM]: i dont give a fuck
Nightriderz2003 [10:31 PM]: ill knock this ho out
Nightriderz2003 [10:31 PM]: he dont want none