|Current music:||kool keith-represent my nuts|
ah. another friday night with nothing to do . wonderful. this makes it the ............shit i cant remember when the weekend was anything to look foward to . lol . i think the reason the weekend isnt anything to look foward is a combination of me havin no girly and having shitty friends . even if im ugly and cant get bitches i should be able to have fun with my friends . well i hate my friends .thats a messed up thing to say , but i don't care . my friends aren't good for me . when i don't hang out with them for awhile things are better off for me . i feel better about myself . i am more focused on school and stuff . and girls come around . at least that is what happened before when i did that . i think i am goin to see if it happens again . my friends have a negative impact on me . they make me feel shitty about myself they do stupid immature things and are just plain stupid . they might have similiar feelings about me . i dotn care . i kind of look foward to growing up . hopefully i get to pick some new friends . that owuld be cool. i think the only reason i still even talk to my friends is the face that i have to see them in school . and that i have known them from my younger years . its just a routine . a habit . one that i need to break .
another thing to bitch about , lol , is the absence of fly bitches in my life . where are the girls at? i need something to break my routine of life so i can meet some girls or something . i had hope that when i had my semester class change that there would be some uncharted territoty in at least one of my classes to get my mack on , but no . theres girls in my classes . girls that i am just friens with . girls that i am just friends with because they are out of my league . thats pretty much every girl . so i have to figure out some way to meet new girls . it would be sweet if i knew someone who could give me the hook up . but i dont . im want to try , but theres no one to try on! fuck
i need somethin to uplift me up outta this . i need somethin to look foward to . somethin to make me happy . what would do that . i wish i knew . one positive thing as of late is this is my 8th day smoking free. a whole week has passed! least one thing is goin right . if i dont let people get the best of me with stress and shti i won't have an urge to smoke again .
today was the day i can eat anything and not care . so i ate a lot . i ate a mega hershey symphony bar . it made me sick . lol . i ate so much . i dont care . ugh . on that note i think i am goin to be sick right now .