| Current mood: |  complacent |
| Current music: | The Neverending Story |
if today gets any better i'll be rolling in glass by midnight.
ok so today i was awaken by a 9:30AM phone call. this is what was said.
Brooke's mom: Amanda?
me: uh yeah?
Brooke's mom: *crying hysterically* Brooke....*more crying*
me: what's wrong?
Brooke's dad: *slight sniffling* Brooke was in a car accident this morning.
me: is she ok?
Brooke's dad: no, she's...she's...passed away.
me: oh my god.
Brooke's dad: we just thought that you may want to know. Brooke considered you to be a very close friend.
me: *thinking to myself: damn i haven't talked to her in like 2 years* well if there's anything i can do just let me know.
Brooke's dad: we appreciate that very much. but we have to go. we love you.
me: i love you too and i'm very sorry.
the end.
needless to say that is never a good way to start a day. wow, did you see that? that totally rhymed! i called in sick to work today. blah.
for some reason i was unbelievably popular today. but around 11:30ish i got a call from and unknown number. i almost didn't answer, but then i did. and it was James. who at that time i liked and he supposedly liked me. so then we proceeded to have a conversation. and somewhere within this conversation we made plans to hang out tonight. which in my head i was screaming with excitement. i had been waiting for him to ask me to hang out with him for oh i don't know how long and it finally happened. i was overjoyed. so then the conversation ended. i had things to do.
ok so i do the things i had to do. and i come home about an hour before our scheduled hang out time, which was supposed to be around 8:30ish, so i'm driving over to his house and as i'm pulling into his appartment complex i see him leaving his appartment complex in this nasty whore's car named Jenn. i was crushed. he just looked at me and then looked away. i felt like a complete idiot. like i was the most hated person on earth. i hate that feeling. i didn't think i could feel that way. for a person of such high self-esteem as myself this was a very difficult thing. so i turned my car around and headed to a real friends house. i hung out for a while but after about an hour i decided that i would just come home and watch The Neverending Story. that movie is better then a therapist. so that will be the last time that i ever talk to James. i'm soo glad i found out what he's really like before i got involved with him.
(would you look at that. as i was writing this James called and tried to apologize for what had happened. i quickly and promptly hung up on his sorry ass)
so now i'm sitting here watching The Neverending Story, again, thinking about why i waste my time with guys that i know are just assholes and aren't worth my precious time.
i met somebody on myspace that is the guy version of myself. which is kind of scary. we think alike and we almost have the same hair. except mine is better. he is beautiful just like me only i'm starting to think that he is more beautiful on the inside than i am. which i wish i could be just as beautiful on the inside as i am on the outside. the only problem is that he lives in Florida. not horribly far away but still a good distance. this kid is great. i don't know what it is about him. like i probably sound crazy but after the first few times i talked to him i felt like i had a connection with him. and then he called me a couple of days ago and we talked for like 3 hours or something crazy like that. he has a really cute voice. wow, i sound like an obcessed 14 year old girl. crazy. but anyway, if i ever meet this kid i will make him marry me. that is all there is to it. <3
ok enough with the obcessive stuff, i couldn't be lucky enough to have a guy like Luke. i only get assholes.
hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. i have tomorrow off of work. how awesome am i? you have no idea.
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