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Why does someone hold grudge against someone? Why do we have small and big fights within friends and family or with someone? A quick answer is maybe because the mind simply refuses to accept people as they are and mostly the opposite party also refuses to accept us as we are. And then our own ego and self-conscience never lets us adjust to the situation naturally. We might still talk to the same person pretending nothing really has happened and we are not at all affected by his actions, but in the back of our minds we still hold the bad feeling that we have towards that person. Its true for that person also. That person also feels the same things about us, and he also pretends and tells as if nothing has happened. That is merely a mental adjustment and we wont truly respect or love that person Many people will disagree with me on the above point,arguing that if our parents or our own close kith and kin do this to us, then we wont hold a grudge. I agree, but I am sure we actually decide to make mental adjustments quicker in such a case. Well why is that? Its because of the basic ignorance which we ourselves have and our close kith/kin also doesnt know Let me explain. We read innumerous books and preachings which tell that meditation, yoga and a healthy lifestyle with someone to love you deeply changes all the above feelings. However, know that no-one, no one but you can help yourself change such a attitude!. If some of you believe in god then you might usually pray to god and get some mental relief. But the greatest secret is, the god which you pray is inside you!, and you are praying to your own self. And then You realize that NOTHING, nothing except you, yourself can change your feelings and actions. The moment you realize how beautiful your self is, then you see god. You see everything else in this world as part of that self, you will start seeing other people as yourself AND YOUY WONT BE AFFECTED BY THEIR ACTIONS. That is a beautiful feeling!. The same feeling or vision is called as enlightenment and Buddha, Our own great sages, Ramana Maharshi, and all such great visionaries had. Now can we get to that same feeling/enlightment which lurks inside us and which these great teachers found? Its next to impossible, especially when we live a common mans life style in india or anywhere else. In india we are bogged down by the pressures of our own daily life including work and other things. Also our own family and friends, (Obviously not knowing the above mentioned enlightenment factor) behave to you in such a manner that only if you are one among them, they really accept you. The moment you start realizing the self or make an attempt to do so, such self-ignorant people try to pull you away Again, as married man leading a family in India, you are expected to function in a particular way. You got to be "responsible". And what is responsibility? It means(my version of it) adjusting to various people,situations and taking decisions after consulting with everyone, keeping all in the loop, adjusting to their eccentricities and behaving nice and happy and intelligent ALL THE TIME. Then whatever decisions you take, you are made accountable for that decision. If it goes wrong, you are the target of many embarassing talks, situations and this leads to agony. All this time what is your self (that is the god within you) doing?. You are moving away from your self(Meaning the god within) in order to satisfy others and attend to such situations/responsibilities. And it is very tough in break out of these situations that arise in a persons life in india As a married man myself, I am still trying to release from these feelings and realize my self, my own god and goodness. Because once you realize the self, you realize god and ONLY THEN you can do pious things, and genuinely help others and yourself. Only then you can release the badness in you. To do this, you need to be in a company of similar thinking people and not with ignorant people busy in the daily grind. And for finding that good company, you need to be lucky! Post a comment in response: |
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