Sinner (subliminal36) wrote, @ 2004-04-04 23:19:00

quench my thrist with absynth, depression is all but MYTH
(this is something i woke up writing... well not really wake up i was in between sleep and conscious and realized i was writing...took me 30min to figure out what it said when i was done)



well where to begin... It's back like a sudden rush of an over used phrase. I'm alone, scared and dont know what to do. Places and people to turn
to are all too few when it feels as if no one cares. No ones here for me anymore like they used to be in the past. They know what they're doing...which
leaves me out on my ass. I have no direction, I've lost control. I fear my present and my future for it's all so unknown. Can't someone come back and
help me let go? Let go of the worries, let go of the fear and of my childish nature and help me clear the thoughts that haze my mind, to lead me to a
tomorrow with clarity direction. I need someone now more then ever someone come back dont leave me alone forever...

This isn't a poem or a lyrical rant it's just me thinking bout the stress on my chest

Do you remember when we first met? Just two poeple in class who never would have thought what happened would. We became quick friends as close
as can be. I told you I loved you but knew it could never be. You were my first kiss as well as one of my first true best friends. We talked to each
other for hours connecting days in one long conversation. I told you your gorgeous cause to me you were the top but then tragedy struck our bubble
of a perfect friendship popped. I blame my self for the loss of what we once had the closeness and trust. I'm trying hard to keep the lingering remains
together, trying so hard to regain what we once had but i feel it it's slipping, fading, falling away. Someday I hope we're back to how we were but the
memories of how we were are fading, clouding up like rising smoke from burning crucifix; turning into something unclear. Were we as good as friends as I
thought or was it all an illusion, a trick of the mind between two people who had found a friend in one another, a companion, a keeper of secrets, a teller
of no lies, a person to go to when they needed a cry. An illusion? No. What was there was real but like so many other things I fucked up. I feel I've lost
you forever and with that I cant deal cause if its true then all i have are memories but with no one to reminice. All I have are my memories...my memories...
and nothing...no one else.

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