You're everything I never knew I always wanted. ( stonefoxx) wrote,
@ 2004-02-11 07:47:00 |
| Current mood: |  lethargic |
| Current music: | none |
story goes on ...without me
well lisas 16th in sat. and i have to finish buying her presents but i know i have to work up the balls to sit down an write the letter...for all of u that dont know the letter is something i have to do its something that explains how i feel about her and y we are meant for each other as far as freinds go ...on special occasions we write these letters...anyways waht am i going to saybecause nothign is the same anymore so much has change i cant lie to her but i also cant make her cry(in a bad way)on her birthday or ever.dotn get me wrong the jessica lisa friendship has been one of the best ever(i mean ever...all of time)10 years of bonding i never once thought those 10 years would be on the line but now they are and im so unprepared how do i tell her that she means so much to me but yet everyday more of us slips away i dont want to say she has changed but she has but then again so have i ...i think she thinks its all my fault we arent as close anymore but its not of course i take 50% of the blame but lets be real here for a sec -factors that lead to this-my mistakes her mistakes my loneliness her unloneliness ryan other firends my rebelious side her confined side me needing to be myself her needing to be herself ryans personality imbeded in her me and nicole getting so close the clash between our personalities her thinking im depressed wasted a lost cause unhappy me thinking she is to in tone to reality tries to hard to be perfect uptight...and now tahts where the blame is! im not mad im jsut upset to loose a friend to all of this but in all honesty i want things back the way the were.
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