ShiannE (shigal) wrote, @ 2004-12-10 22:52:00

After walking back into the room from his break, out of nowhere he says "Shianne one of these days someone is going to write a song about you." {fyi he plays drums in a band} I asked why and he said "because your name is,like, perfect for a song. And because of just who you are." After a moment of silence I couldn't stop smiling and said that was the best, sweetest compliment he's ever given me. And I said thank you. He said "you're very welcome." I told him that I wanted him to be the one.
I like him so much I can't stand it. I actually told him sometime last week too - about my feelings for him. He said he knew and thought I was amazing, but that he wasn't ready for a girlfriend (he's never had one).. but couldn't stop saying how flattered he is.
He thought I was hurt, as I went home that night.. but I wasn't. I was proud of myself, and relieved that it was out there. I guess for the rest of the night he was all out of it and told Becca what had happened.. seeing as how she is one of my closest friends anyways. ( I didnt mind )
He said that he didnt understand why I had chosen him to have feelings for because he was just some kid. Becca said that it's different because I know he's not just some guy and that him and I have a connection. He agreed. Yet he was worried that he "would lose me" because he had turned me down.
But to me, he didn't really turn me down. he was flattered and accepted my feelings.
And I know he feels for me - I just wish he would take the leap. With me, it wouldn't be like some high school fling that would most likely happen with other girls. I read him so easily & Im still so intrigued.
He's admitted that he's never been close to anyone ever in his life really - yes, he's a virgin too.
But since then things have not been "weird" between us. They have been the same.
Smiles and talking about deep things, and burning each other meaningful songs. And always talking about hanging out together.
Just liking this guy makes me happy. Even if sort of unobtainable - I am happy meeting him and feeling this only for him.

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