| Current mood: |  drained |
| Current music: | Other World |
After a long long time
well I've not updated most of summer no time. I've been hanging with my friend Gavin, and stephen the most. Just hanging out at hte mall, renting video games, movies, going to hte movies, swimming, playing football just a bunch of diffrent stuff. Got to meet Gavins cousin, natalie, whoa She's nice, good looking, but not too girly, though shes a bit clean and tidy (everything int eh right spot) but other then that shes totally great. Possiably date.. maybe? dunno. Then On the tenth Sarah, should be coming back, Who's a 19 yr old modle who lives down teh street, but goes out of state for shoots and what not. SO when she gets back i'll try and hang out with her, and I'll hit on her, though What'd you expect? As a whole this summers been great, i've done a whole lot of stuff, but latly I've been going back to my normal self, well really coming back outta my illusions and fun back to reality. I found out my father was adopted, so all of my heritage I thought was mine isn't mine, and it explains why he always says he'd never give me up. Money's still tight, really the past year and a half we've been on edge... not knowning if we were gonna be able to pay the next bill. Now we dont know if we'll even be here another 30 days. This may be one of my last entries. All the people I know here all the memories, everything left behind, though i dont really mind it all that much, since I planed on moving away as soon as I can. Just everything, I dealed with, and no one knows a thing. All my friends.. my closest friends, even my friends I call family dont know about some of my problems...well any of them. I shrug everything off, I laugh and joke and do all of this stuff, to keep people from knowing somehting wrong, I dont want sympathy, i dont want pitty, and I dont want help, I just want...well, I dont want to burdon people with my problems. I Like to keep myself locked up, and never let anyone see me, I'm probably repeating things I've already said before, but someitmes i just have to keep saying them, just keep getting it out . I love people, my closets friends, I never say anything, Just makes it harder when I might have to go. thats another reason I dont wanna get close.. not that i might get hurt, but because of things like this, and I might have to leave them and if I really do bond then its just much worse on myself when I have to go. I'm just gonna stop rambling
(Read comments)
|
