| Current mood: |  bitchy |
| Current music: | Futurama |
An epiphany.
My friends suck.
Not you guys, my...in person friends. I might be a spoiled brat because I can't stand being told no but how can you be spoiled by people who always let you down? It's probably a personality flaw on my part, maybe I'm just a terrible person but you know what? I am who I fucking am and if they can't accept me that way, maybe I just need to get new friends. I try, I do, but new friends never seem to stick. I think I get intimidated that new people have old friends who are better than me and how can I compete with that? It's a confidence issue for sure, but more than that because if they liked me more, they'd come after me instead of me being up their asses - in the words of a friend of mine.
This comes from what could be my final attempt to get a group of friends together for a Hollywood excursion. I know what they'll all say or do. One of them will say sure and then she'll accept a half day of work because her boss is desperate (right, because retail is such a difficult industry) and I'm not important enough for her to take a single day off. No, I know she'll do it because she did it to me on my birthday. She's my best friend. My second closest friend will say no, because #1 she'll say she's broke but I'm inviting her boyfriend as well who can easily pay for this ONE thing (I'm equally as poor, but I'm still going), and #2 even though he's invited, she's spending that particular day with her boyfriend ALONE because she's SOOO in love (nobody's THAT in love for THAT long) and probably really horny because they haven't had sex yet. Get over it, do it, and get back to your normal fucking life. And the other friend I've invited will say no because her other friend got knocked up straight out of high school and is always having SOME issue with her baby's daddy so of course, it makes complete sense that friend #3 has to be involved, right? I could invite my other group of friends but one of them broke her leg and would say no anyway, another would ruin it anyway because she's so boring and has to be in bed by 9pm (she's lucky she buys me things), and another is only interested in hanging out at a bar in the middle of the week with all of the shady men that I usually avoid. There are others but usually I get ahold of them through those last three because we're really not that close aaaaand...I don't have their numbers.
I complain too much, but you know, point is, my friends suck.
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