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Honey, baby, sweetie-pie (sefyra) wrote,
@ 2003-12-03 23:24:00
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    Current mood: enraged

    Well, it was a banner fuckin night....
    And then I got home.

    A little history: my family's moving to Florida because my dad finally got a job, and I'm trying like hell to stay here, because hell if I'm leaving behind a solid circle of friends, a college-career all planned out, and a boyfriend of three years. So tomorrow the house is being shown to a realtor- not even any prospective buyers yet, just a realtor to assess a value and suggest some areas of improvement. So I was commanded to clean my room, and since I didn't have to work today after school, I did ninety percent of it before Andy came to hang out. So he sat here for twenty minutes while I worked some more on my room, at which point I said "Fuck it, I'll finish when I get home."

    I don't know WHAT the fuck happened in the time I was gone, but I came home to my mom unlocking the door, no greeting like normal, throwing the door keys on the floor after I come in. I figure it's probably something my dad did, so I hike upstairs and get right to work again.

    I'm putting away my cd's when I hear behind me, "You gonna finish this damn room?"
    "Yes," I say, "I'm doing it right now."
    "I thought you'd do the whole thing before you left, before you went anywhere or did anything. I didn't even think you were doing anything tonight. You'll never get all this done."
    "What are you talking about? I got ninety percent of it done before I left, and here I am working on it again! I know I'm not done, I realize this."
    "Pf, it still looks like shit. You get this fucking room clean. I will not have to worry every time we have to show this house to people about whether your room is a fucking disaster or not."
    "Fuck you, get it clean and you keep it that way or you can find somewhere else to stay."
    "Yeah, well, I'm working on that too."
    "Not fucking fast enough."

    My mom has been the only good (if not stable) thing at home since I was five. So now that I've gone out and bought her a Christmas present and I was feeling bad because I wasn't moving to Florida with them and I thought my mom was upset about it, she turns into a big fucking bitch. So now I don't know what the fuck to do. Andy's parents are in South America for a week, and I'm really tempted just to crash there for a week since he can drive his mom's car and I can drive his. But after that week, what the hell do I do? They probably won't let me come back if I leave, even if only temporarily and I make that clear, and then I have no car and a half-hour commute to work and an hour to school. So my hands are fucking tied, and all I can do is put up with more bullshit from them until I can get a car. That's the only thing holding me back, really, is not having a car, and after that I might just take Ken up on his offer of a room at his place and that'll be the fucking end of that.

    Why fucking now? Right when I have to save every penny I earn, and all I want to do is get rilly fucking trashed and not think about anything for a while.

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