| Current mood: |  depressed |
| Current music: | Army of me - bjork |
confused???????????????????????? desperate, depressed
well i am confused and well i guess a little depressed but for some weird reason i don't know why. well my friend did tell me that my other two friends "fred and barney" did stuff together and i guess maybe that has a little do with how i am feeling. but i don't really care what fred and barney do is there biz i mean come one it isn't like i like either of them. Okay maybe i do like barney just a little but i dont think that would make me feel like this i mean yeah it adds but it doesn't take over. it isn't like it is the major worry in my life to be honest i don't know what is maybe this whole state of depression is all in my head and well if it is i hate it. i had a migraine all day and it killed me i didn't to be a school i didn't want to talk to anyone not even my hag but i did because i love her and would never want to make her feel bad though i felt like crap. tomorrow i am going to go to my guidance counsler to talk about getting out of spanish. I hate that class! i think i know what is causing the problem i just want a boyfriend that is what is killing me inside everyone has there own special someone and me being gay makes just a little harder i mean i know plenty of gay guys but they aren't what i would call boyfriend material maybe a fuck-buddy but to be honest i am down with all of that (pardon my words ) SHIT! i just want someone to cuddle with hold hands with i want someone to walk me to class damnit i just want to love someone and be loved in return but i see that, that day is far away and it kills me. it truly kills me inside i fell like Shit! and i don't think it is going to get any better one can only hope
(Read comments)
|
