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Okay. So it's really obvious you're talking about me. First of all, I dont mean to make you more 'depressed' then you already 'are'. Maybe you should go to a professional? I already tried that.. but you never seem to wanna take responsibility for your actions. I'm not really sure what i did specifically, because YOU never confronted me with your feelings, and you kept them inside, so how was i supposed to help? I dont ruin your happiness. YOU let it ruin YOU. Believe me, I of all people know this. It's exactly how i used to feel. When you're trying to have a good day, and someone says something that maybe you dont like, you get sad and mad, because it SEEMS like that person is ruining your day on purpose. Usually, they're not, and it's pretty mean to blame me for your sadness, just because i'm the easiest one to pick apart, i guess. Maybe I have been hard on you, and I'm sorry. But you've got to understand some things. Ever since my parents got divorced, I've had this 'thing' where I like to try and get away from my problems which doesnt really work. I would try and try but it never worked. So I'd have these 'breakdowns' or whatever you wanna call 'em where I'd cry and cry just like you do, and sometimes end up blaming people for things they didnt do. It was fucked up. Yeah.. but as you know, I have been depressed ever since my parents divorce and remarrying thing. And another thing is, you gotta understand that your life is...well.. not so hard compared to mine, I guess. I know what you're gonna say, ' you dont know what its like to be me'. And, thats true. I dont. But.. think about this. My mom and dad got divorced in a time of my life where I was starting to feel good about myself. They both got remarried about 2 years later. My step-parents are rude, and horrible, mean parents Their kids suck My mom is a drunk, basically. So is my stepdad. My mom is a selfish, spoiled brat who thinks only about herself, and is a horrible mother, and takes her feelings out on me. My stepdad. Well, you already know about him I've never had a 'real' boyfriend. Like, one that actually cared. I have no one who really 'cares' deeply about me. I'm ugly and fat. I have no life. Basically I am shy in general, and sometimes too weird. ---- so yeah. theres nothing on that list that relates to you. She's also disappointed me in several ways too Well, excuse me . I cant help if i change. People change in general, and you really have no right to say all that nasty shit about me, which is mostly all lies. I didnt 'change' myself to get people to like me. I 'changed' because I wanted to. Coz i was tired of being the 'old' me , i guess. As for biased, isnt everyone? It's hard for everyone to be open-minded to everything, including yourself. And hypocritical? I dont really believe that. I also believe that you can be hypocritical yourself. But I've been thinking about all this stuff lately... like how she's hurt me and stuff. You know what? I know this entry is a pity entry for yourself. You just expect everyone to go, 'omg. alex is such a bitch. i hate her now'. It's not like I am the only cause of your depressed feelings. Which is what you're saying, basically. I just want you to know that, I am not defending myself because I'm afraid of what people think. I'm doing it because I feel this entry of yours is very unfair to me, and hypocritical, too. Just think about that next time you try to pick on me, and make me seem like the most horrible person in the world <3 always, Alex ------------------------------ that was it. Post a comment in response: |
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