| Current mood: |  lonely |
so its Sunday, my last day of break! ugh! This sux! I gotta go back to school tomorrow, and im guna be all lonely! Hopefully chels will go. Hmmm not like it would make a bit of a diff. I've been invisible for awile, starting toget used to it. Doesnt really phase me. Iono. I was all happy and "hyper" today at the rink and then i got back to krystal's house wit her and chels and i was jus in lonely shitty ass mood. And it doesn't really make thangs much easier when i gotta listen to chels and krystal make out and do god knows what all nite and today. But hey atleast there "happy". And the fact that if i wanna be in a shitty then leave me the fuck alone and let me be in a shity mood. Don't yell at me and try to make me be happy, cuz its pointless. Happiness is make believe. Life doesn;t come wiit happines, you gotta find it. You have to take the right path in life that leads to it, and well obivousl i took a wrong turn somewhere. hmmm whats new. Geez im so tired. I didn;t go to sleep till 7:30 this morning and i woke up at 12. Newho we went to the rink today cuz Ricky and Jake went up there. Ricky and Krytal might go back out again and i think me and Jake are gunna start talking, but its so difficult. I have all these chances wit so many other guys, but i can't take them cuz i still have Justin in every thoght my mind produces. Supposidly he wants me bak, he's my one weakness, i am a fairly strong person when it comes to life but he's my one weakness. I'll never have the strength to turn him down if he were to come crawling back, yet i kno he can never prove himself to me. He told me Friday that he feels like an ass for breakin up wit me and he misses me and he jus wanted me to stay the nite wit him. Like i said, he's my weakness, it could reak of pure bullshit (all the thangs he tells me) but i'll always believe him. He's like a fucking addicition. This will never end.
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