|Current mood:|| anxious|
|Current music:||Trapt "Hollowman"|
" 'Cuz I'm free, and I don't think I wanna be, freedom's too scary for me"
Aaaaah! It's Sunday nite, the day before my first day back to school. Senior year. Most people would say they are excited, they can't wait. That's not me. I'm scared of what's to come. I want to be a kid, just a kid. When I graduate I will become an adult. There will be no more dependence on mum and dad. I will have my own life in my little hands. I hold the future. But I don't want to hold the future and become dependent on myself yet. I want my room, not my house or appartment. I'm just a kid, I need to be a kid. I like to be independent, it's true, but I still feel not ready for life on my own. I know I will not be alone, but In it's own way I will be. So senior year, last year. They say it's the end of the beginning when you graduate. Why do I have to leave the beginning? I'm not one to cry, it's sort of a thing I just don't really do. But when I think of all this, I almost do, and that's saying a lot. I'm just scared, and I can't get out of this feeling.
I can't recall when I wasn't so tall
and school was my only doubt
I can't remember those days in november
when I thought I had it all figured out
Cuz I'm standin in front of a mountain
screamin and shoutin
yes I'm standin in front of a mountain
Cuz I'm free
and I don't think I wanna be
Freedom's too scary for me
I don't think I wanna be free
Free ~ Matt Fisher (The Sly Caps)
blah blah blah. and then there's more. the song is great.