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holland (not) the country (not_the_country) wrote,
@ 2004-02-09 23:00:00
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    Current mood: weird
    Current music:Sparta_Collapse

    .. i'm standing where the ground meets the sky
    i feel like everything is moving so fast but still in slow motion. I don't know if that makes any sense and it probably doesn't, but in my mind it fits so work with me.
    i don't know how to describe it, but its sort of like this- so much is going on right now,not just with my senior year, but just life in general and the emotions and thoughts that are all residing in the hearts of every 17 or 18 year old. I mean the months and the days seem to all mesh even though the 7 pointless hours spend at school seem like an eternity and the only thought that gets me through the day is that 'this is almost over'. I mean goodness, there has to be more than this...
    ah..well, with that said i found this old cd that brightened up my day immensely. It had some old OutKast, Dave, Incubus andd someother mess i don't even know but it was hippy-ish and made me glad and went well with my strawberry/banana/apricot smoothie i made. So i sat on my windowseat and stared at the grayness of the sky and listened to it on repeat while i did pyschology AP and everything just felt dry and gloomy.
    I've decided that these months are the months when it feels like nothing can go right, when everything just sort of stands still or falls apart, its a make or break period i think. And so far, i'm bitterly making it, but making it none the less.
    I think i need to do something that would liven up these dead, colorless months.
    I saw my friend Sarah Richey's hair the other weekend and fell in love because she is just such a bright beam of *new and fresh* and i want a beam of hers or something.
    But i will figure all that out after i go do baskets, and barrels, and bundles and bunches of laundry after a quickie shower, and i think i have cancer on my leg? grreat.



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