-rubs his head with the tips of his fingers and sets the bottle of vodka down on the table, his eyes bleary and tired looking-
I feel like complete and utter shit. I was hyped up like hell yesterday. I was hyper and running around with the guys and just making a jackass of myself when I had to stop and think, Why am I running around being stupid when my cousin's in a wheelchair? Stupid fucker. So I sobered right up and went to see him. I hung out with him, his girl and two other chicks last night but I just wasn't into it.
Maybe I'll be better today but it's not most likely. I'm real worried about Tony even if I act like I'm not. I know he'll be alright, but I'm just a pussy wanker and worry about him anyway. He's family, what the fuck am I gonna do? Laugh it off?
Um, it feels really weird to be typing in a journal. I talked to Benji. Seems like things aren't going so good. I wish him the best of luck. It ain't easy being in love but things will work out. Look at me dishing out advice. And ones that actually make sense, too. -laughs- So yeah, that's it. Thank you and goodnight.
-picks his bottle of vodka right back up and heads outside to look for his cousin-
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