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hey this is gabz. i cant log into my other account on this computer beccause of how cool this like "bess protected" shit is. okay so its not bess but its still lame as a motherfucker for not letting me get on my deadjournal. alright- so how is everyone? doing swell? i know im a backstabbing piece of crap for not writing in you anymore and then coming back and expecting you to still be here, welcoming me with open arms. i'm suprised this is even a valid journal anymore. well i dont know how much of this i can take, this keyboard is really loud, and its completely magnified by the room too. its a bitch and a half. alright so we're in memphis tennessee today, and i met this really cool guy named tater who owns this shop here. he's awesome. he's met all these famous people, he used to be on the air and he made his station soar to number one within a matter of 2 weeks... he's just a pimp. he's mt almost everyone and he was really nice. the only fucked up thing was he was hitting on my mother... but then again he was hitting on all of us so... alright lets see... one good thing about looking older than i am- no one questions what im doing. i'm sitting in this little tiny "concierge" room at this 4 star hotel, and people walk past knowing full well that im not looking up the weather in kansas or whatever people use concierge stations for and dont say a damn thing to me. thank you- i'll be absorbing as much of THAT as i possibly can. well memphis is pretty cool. i mean it took 5 hours to get here from buloxi and we're going home tomoro (thank god.) after we go see a bunch of elvis shit. i'll promise to try and write more often... after all, i have been kind of avoiding it and now i have no reason to. i dont even remember what my reason was in the first place. i really miss j-me. i really miss NOT being in a car. today the cooler tipped on me and spilled freezing cold water all down my crotch. then the valet parking guys were making fun of me and asking me what the hell happened. they're like "do you need a towel or something...?" all in all this has been a pretty fun vacation. except for today, it's been a while since i completely snapped at my mom. (a week to this day exactly). she's becoming a real bitch all over again though and it's making me remember why i dislike spending time with her at all. and then she throws back in my face "WHY DONT I JUST BUY YOU SOME MORE SOUVENIERS SO YOU CAN TREAT ME LIKE SHIT! its a huge joke. its a huge, fucking joke. i'm so sick of this shit. honestly, i block it out of my mind reeeeally well when nothing is going on but then when something starts me off i'm back in the old mode of wanting to fucking sever her head from her body. yesterday we spent the night at this comfort inn in downtown memphis. we went down beale street today and ate at one of bb kings restaurant. yesterday reese witherspoon was filming the life of johnny cash outside one of these restaurants and we got to walk past the set. my eyes are blurry. i'm sick of plastering on this smile and putting on this fake persona people do when they're from out of town and in hotel rooms. i miss j-me. i'm sick of being with my family for the majority of everyday, i'm sick of my sisters bitchy comments on everything she sees, i'm sick of andi's control freak syndrom that she pops into randomly, i'm sick of my moms COMPLAINING and RELENTLESSNESS. i am sick of being on vacation. i'm sick of not getting any action. when this one winds down it will be a well deserved vacation FROM vacation on my part... because this is just getting ridiculous. i cant wait till my mom goes back to work at nights. i cant wait to give j-me his voodoo doll ahahah. i cant wait to get the 9 hours out of the way that it will take to drive home. i hate even fucking thinking about it. i'm never going in a car again. since none of us really knew where to go this summer, we went to these random ass places my mom picked out. next year im fucking staying home. it was nice and all, but i'm done with this over-a-week long thing. i mean one week is nice- nice enough to not shoot eachother. but any time over that... seriously i just want to be back home. like... i want my own personal space back. i want to be able to listen to my music and write and read and stop the car rides. and i want to see people i know that i'm NOT related to. this is the most pointless entry i've ever written and i'm sorry that i've had to just THROW all of this on you. i'm sorry. i love you. i'm going back to the hotel room. Post a comment in response: |
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