| Current mood: |  bored |
| Current music: | _+pLeH+_ |
...saw I ereht oS
So there i was...helpless, not knowing what to do...I just kept looking around at all the crowds of people...they were all around me...i could faintly see the lights from ambulances and cop cars coming from the distance...i couldn't hear a thing...and i couldn't even feel the massive rain pouring down on me...i don't even remember if i was crying still...i'm pretty sure i was...i was just in so much shock...there in my arms layed the love of my life...dying...right in front of me...and there wasn't a thing i could do...i just kept applying pressure on the bullet wound like you see them do on the movies...i wonder if i'm even really suppose to be doing that?...it didn't really matter though...i knew he was dead any way...everything was in total slow motion...and all such a blur...i didn't know what to feel...sad that he was dying...pist that it was his fault...or pist at the person who shot him?...I was mad that he had told me that his drug dealing was over...but apparently it wasn't...there was just so much blood...how could he do this to me?...if he had just told me the truth and stuck to his promice...i wouldn't be getting blood and gutter water all over my new $ 130 jeans...why did he lie to me?...why did i trust him?...I should've just left him...then at least i wouldn't have to now live with his death constantly hanging over me...that fucking ass hole...why did i believe him?...why did i have have to love him?
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