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Angel From Your Nightmare (loveyoulikeido) wrote,
@ 2005-01-07 17:38:00
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    Why can't he see me?
    Argh, I feel like the dumbest girl..I can't say that enough. Why do I pine over someone who doesn't even like me. I am currently intrested in my best friend..Why am I into him....Well because he's awesome. He's a great person even though in his past he might have been not so great but now he's a good person..And he has a good heart and it shows. You can tell he's at peace in a way, you can tell in his eyes. He listens to me and cares about what I say, and actually cares about people in general. I feel like I have a connection with him and that sometimes I dont even have to say anything for him to know that I'm upset or happy. So of course I would develop feelings for him. There's only a slight problem. He's head over heels for his exgirlfriend. The first time we met he talked about her and since then our connection was the pain that we had for our exes. I seeminly have moved on and for a while there I thought he did too...until she came back into his life. Granted, I have no clue who she is or what she is about but all I know is the stuff he told me she put him through and I dont like her. I dont think she is good for him in no way shape or form, he's even going to court because of her on tuesday but he believes because she had said it that it isn't her fault. She tried to get them to drop the charges. I hate it. I hate it beause that means no more me and more connection I have with him and I guess that means for sure i dont stand a chance. He had told my roomate that he did like me and he even told his ex he had slept with only one other girl but didn't do anything because he didn't want to change something good into evil...but if he goes back to her it's a slap in the face to me...but it's not just my feelings. It's him I worry about too. What if he goes back to how he use to be? THat's not where he was happy..he deserves a way better life than what he would have with her. He'd not be the person that I know and care so deeply about. I just want to scream at him that I like him that I could treat him better but I can't. Because it doesn't matter. He is my best friend he should know how I feel towards him. I just wish she never came back into his life. I wish he could see what she is really made of and wake up. But although I dont support them together....I support him in being happy and if that makes him happy why should I get my feelings involved?

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