My feelings grow more and more
My roomate and i joke about the way we are. Our feelings for guys in our lives flucuate day to day and at certain times. I'm falling more and more for my friend and I dont know what to do about it. I dont want to do anything bout it but then again I dont want to be stuck in this plateau of feelings that never change. A few months ago my friend and I messed around and during it he was saying all this stuff about how he liked me and everything. I figured it was just the alcohol talking but then the next day my roomate asked him about it and he was going on and on about how he did like me but he's going thru so much right now and that he didnt want to hurt me. Well we've maintained a really close friendship since then and we talk daily but in the beginning he talked to me about it or at least tried but i always changed the subject because of fear and now i regret that. But my roomie has talked to him numerous times and he's story is always that he likes me and he really cares for me but he doesnt' want to hurt me ever and that he wants to be in my life for a long time. And that when he gets into a relationship he gets really crappy and treats his girls like crap and he doesn't ever want to do that to me. So i'm like well then is this a nice way of letting me down but if it is..why on earth does he call me EVERYDAY (which i'm not complaining about) and we get together everyday even if it's for an hour. He smokes with me and i smoke with him and like sometimes i wish we could just be friends with benefits but when my roomate asked him about that he said there'd be too many feelings involved. DOes that mean on my part? I'm soo confused in a sense about him. He is my best friend and vice versa. He doesn't hang out with really anyone else but me and two other people. and i'm the only girl but it's weird because in high school he was surrounded by people and always had girls and shit and now he'll talk about girls but he's antisocial. He admits to it. But why? Like everyday it seems like i like him more and more because he's got a lot of qualities that I want in a guy. He makes me laugh...all the freakin time....he calls me when he says he will....we hang out and it can be quiet and there's no awkard silence but see that';s where it's tough because I dont erally want to talk to him about it because I refuse to..but then it comse to all with the games..the hints, the hidden meanings all of that crap!!! AHHH....anyways...i'm sorry to bore you wiht this but i just had to get it off my chest.