|Current music:||to make you feel my love..........................|
thru the conversations with two very important ppl. to me over the past few days
ive been reflecting myself, hidden in thought, and not so hidden as well.
i have also been digging in my soul, because the pain is too much
the pain of death is so hard for me it makes me stronger. it amplifies my
need to protect and it is a security of mine if ever i think my job is done or
if i need to continue no longer.because i will never be done, as long as i can
not stop people destroying people, then i will fight to protect all.
the path to protection is a deep, confusing, beautiful road to a place i
dont want to end up. to a place i am fighting to destroy. corruption, and destruction
i walk this path beacuse it is the only way to gain enough strength, both
mental and physical to destroy all corruption, all deveint minds, to stop
the pain of the world around us. but, my strength numbers more than one,
when the point of corruption hits my life, i will destroy this and will be
able to continue. in perfection.
the path to perfection ultimatly leads to death, but
i have a yearning, a feeling in my heart that tells me life and death are the
same, the diffrence is the transition. so
on my road to perfection, when i die, is when i will be perfect, and because i
die i will have destroyed the corruption within myself.
this will be a time when miricles start to happen.
but before this i have a full life ahead of me.
for i keep being told that i am only 20 years old.
and the two most important people to me know that i have
to have children, to save myself, and to continue this
ability, this choise of protection above all else.
i fear that my path pushes any chances to have children
away because of what i do. what i am.
i pray somebody will find the love that i give.
i pray she chooses to look past my life but to look
at my love instead. beacuse in this she will find a happiness
that we create. together.
to the people that keep me...... hold me.......this is the time
that i need you more than ever. to the people that love me....
show me.....because i love you unconditionally......to the people
that hate me.......fear me beacuse your time is coming very soon....
to the people that fear me.........dont, because i still love you.