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LittleKittyPants (lilkittypants) wrote,
@ 2004-04-24 17:33:00
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    Current mood: depressed

    Prozac Diary
    Hey, long time no see.

    My computer's still busted, hence the no writing. I'm completely unmotivated, which also helps... aka. why i'm writing this instead of doing work.

    I just completely feel like shit. I kind of realized that much of this is b/c of the depression and medication, plus my self-medication, which isn't helping. I feel like i'm falling down a black hole and there's nothing i can do to claw my way back up.

    For many reasons, some good and some bad, no one is here with me right now, and i wonder about that. why i'm sitting here alone, and what i've done to make it this way.

    its all fucking up my school work and my relationship with a lot of people. i just want to be me again.

    my only saving grace is when i actually get something accomplished, but that good feeling doesn't last as long is it usually dones. or when i'm with someone who understands exactly what i'm going through. even though i feel isolated i have that one special person who i can talk to and i don't feel crazy anymore, i feel like what's been going on isn't just me. thank you so much special person.

    "True, I have many voices. I speak like a let-down lover, a diarist, a social critic, straight sass. I fear I am everything, which of course amounts to being nothing." --Lauren Slater, Prozac Diary

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