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LGoodman (ladygoodman) wrote,
@ 2003-10-26 21:25:00
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    Current music:"All Right Now" -Free

    While I was on the plane trying not to think about death, trying not to think about the meals they wouldn't be serving.. I'd sit silently with some thoughts. One being that I've always kind of assumed I'd end up with an eating disorder, which is an odd thing to think-I know. Don't worry about me or anything I don't have one, and if I do develop one I'll get help, or I'll at least tell someone who I know would get me help. I'd like to think I'm smart enough to do that. I wonder which kind I'd have, if I developed one.. my train of thought hasn't ever gone farther than to think I'll just develop one at some point. I don't think I could be bulimic since I don't like throwing up, and my teeth are already bad enough. Anorexia is at least plausible. Anyhow, I've always seen it happening to me, and I wonder if anyone else thinks like this. Or if its healthy, or sane even. Mind you I was having these thoughts while continually filling my cup with Mountain Dew.

    At a point I forgot to be afraid of the plane, and then the TVs really started bothering me. None of them have the same coloration.. the picture I mean, on some it would be darker, some green tinted, some lighter.. and I wondered if it was because of where I was sitting. But it bothered me, it really did. Sometimes I really worry about myself.

    I didn't miss this place while I was gone. I'm beginning to feel the need for people less and less, and I wonder what that's supposed to mean.



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