bang bang maxwells silver hammer came down on her head.. bah da bah da da
shit is fucked. i think that about sums up everything in my life right now. its weird because im listening to old man by neil young and he said take a look at my life as i was typing life. does that make sense? it does to me at the moment. but a lot of shit does, because today was a pretty crazy day. my mind is pretty blown at the moment. its weird because right now, i feel like.. who i am as a person, what i have to offer.. isnt good enough. and that feels kind of awful. "you and what you stand for just isnt good enough." but i try. and i feel like im a fairly simple person, i just cant find anyone to see that deeply. i cant find someone whos on my level i guess, and i dont know if that makes me crazy? i cant find anyone because theres no one who will take the time to figure me out, or be intrigued enough to learn something. i think im a very educated person. im well read, im considerate, i have insanely good morals, im really really into literature and music. i dont know, the concepts of life just baffle me sometimes. you think things would be simpler, like you know the way a situation should end, because that would just be the right, moral, simple solution. but no one ever accepts it. they always want more. people are fucking selfish. like, you have something in front of you.. take it! give it a chance. i dont know. i just thought of something that completely contradicted myself. why do i think so much. its my need to know things. i want to know peoples true intentions all the time. and i just over analyze and pick apart. im babbling. and im going to bed. fuck this.
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