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King Of Pain (kingofpain) wrote,
@ 2006-10-20 12:10:00
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    Anthony Lutz
    Paper #4

    Spanking As A Form Of Discipline

    Is spanking really the best way to punish a child? In my opinion, I don’t think it is, I think there are better forms of punishment. I believe that spanking demonstrates that it is okay for an adult to hit a child, a stronger person hitting a weaker person. I don’t think spanking a child teaches them the difference between right and wrong. I think it makes children afraid to disobey their parents when they are present, but when parents are not around to punish, the child will misbehave. As a result, I don’t think spanking is an effective form of discipline.
    There are better ways to teach a child. Children learn as they grow, and sometimes they do forget things. As a parent, you don’t follow all the rules all the time, or do you? Kids will screw up every once in a while just like you do. Talking gets better results than hitting a child will. If you talk to your kids, they might be more understanding of where you are coming from. Instead of violence, kids need guidance.
    Spanking makes children feel worse about themselves. It can give confusing messages, especially to a child who is too young to even understand why they are being spanked. Spanking also makes the relationship of a parent to a child more distant. Being a parent means you are trusted and respected, not feared. If a parent uses spanking as punishment, the child may lose respect for the parent over a long period of time. Therefore, the parent will need to learn different ways to discipline without spanking.
    Spanking can increase anger in the child and the adult. When a child is humiliated, they either hold it in or rebel. Basically, spanking may make the child afraid to repeat their mistakes, but it is more likely to make the child fear the person spanking them. Children whose behavior is controlled by spanking throughout their youth may appear okay on the outside, but hurt on the inside. After a while, many children that are spanked find it hard to trust others. However, parents who examine their feelings after spanking, realize that all they have accomplished is releasing their anger on the child. Spanking can be addicting in the fact that it releases anger, which can sort of be an ongoing cycle of a wrong form of punishment.
    Spanking can bring back bad memories. A child’s memories of being spanked can cover up very happy times of when they were growing up. Many people usually remember more traumatic events over the pleasant ones. There are people who remember growing up in a loving home, but they might remember being spanked which isn’t a pleasant memory at all. I think a parent’s goal should be to leave a child remembering as many happy events in their life as possible.
    Not all children who experience spanking turn out to be aggressive, but the more often a child is hit, the more likely they’ll have aggressive behavior.
    Why isn’t spanking treated like spousal abuse? This is just as bad of abuse, only it is one adult doing it to another. If a couple is having problems in the relationship, and her partner hit her because he was upset with something she did, most people would tell her to get out of the house, he shouldn’t be hitting you. Others may tell her that someone who’s hit before will not change, and the abuse will get worse. So what is the difference in spanking a child, and a man hitting his wife? In a sense, they are both trying to teach discipline. Or they could spank or hit because they were in “a rage”. This scenario does seem realistic, the husband loses control and hits the wife, or the mother loses control and spanks the child.
    To deliberately hurt someone is a serious issue. However, can spanking make children more violent to other kids? It’s simply saying it’s okay to hurt someone who is smaller or weaker than you. I have often heard people say that they were spanked as a kid, and they turned out okay. If you think about it, the painful memories that were there have faded.
    Discipline can help children learn to develop self control. Discipline is setting limits and fixing any wrongdoings. Discipline encourages children by guiding them, and helping them to feel good about themselves and teaching them how to think for themselves. Even though spanking is used to directly control a child’s behavior, it does not teach them how to change what they do. Discipline should help children learn how to control their own behavior, not teach bad behavior. Also, spanking can teach children to be afraid of the adults in charge. Good discipline teaches children to respect the adult in charge. With good discipline, children will learn to control their own behavior even when you’re not around to watch them. Children do not need to be hit in order to learn how to behave.
    Instead of spanking your children, you can help them learn self control, but at the same time, you can help them feel good about themselves. In addition, you can show them how a person with self control acts. You can guide them and set limits to correct misbehaving or by talking to them. But most important, as parents, you should teach your children how to think. After all, discipline is how adults teach children to grow to be happy, safe, well adjusted members of society.
    In conclusion, children need to be taught discipline because they are not born with it. As children grow, parents have to teach it to them. Altogether, teaching children discipline takes lots of time and practice, but hopefully they’ll learn how to control their own behavior. Also, teaching discipline does not have to hurt the parent or the child. However, raising children can be touch, but as children learn to control their own behavior, discipline becomes easier. Therefore, children will eventually become responsible for their own actions.

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