| Current mood: |  cheerful |
girl...cowgirl
"So anong plano mo?"
"Ayoko naman siyang gawing girlfriend e. Pero tawang-tawa talaga ako sa kanya, nagbukas ng bote ng toma ginamit niya ngipin niya. Cowboy talaga yun."
The cowgirls are never anyone’s idea of a girlfriend. They’re just the most fun people to be with. The ones who receive the “I really love your company” compliments. And that really sucks.
"You might be in over your head, Peter."
"I just really love hanging out with her."
I was reading through an article by caravaggio entitled To Be an Effective Girlfriend, You Have to Think Like a Man and I could totally relate to this. I've always been more at home with guys than girls (not counting my best friends, that is) and have been told that I was "one of the boys" over a dozen times. They say that in a good way. They, referring to the guys I hang out with. It doesn't really bother me. Men usually don't give you that much crap. Sure, they try to be "pa-sweet" and "pa-gentleman" to the girls but with a "one of the guys" kind of girl like me, they act normal. It's not so bad. At least I get to see them in their original and unpretentious demeanor. We can talk about anything and everything. They could burp and express their chauvinistic ideas in my presence and I wouldn't mind. I, in turn, could laugh so hard that they could see my tonsils and yet not be ashamed of it. The problem comes when I start liking a guy and he only sees me as, well, just one of the guys. That just sucks.
Take this guy I've been spending a lot of time with. We always have fun watching movies, eating out, wall climbing, and whatnot and yet when I asked him whether we were dating or not, he told me we were just hanging out. Fine. I told him I just needed to define things and wanted to know what "this" was. He clarified that we were hanging out and just having fun. If it ended up as something more, then lucky us. But he also couldn't assure me as to what he was feeling right now and what he wanted right now. Okay.
Do guys really put that distinction when it comes to girls that are girlfriend material and girls that are just one of them? (Let's not even put in the factor of being wife material or just remaining girlfriend material.) If you're considered as one of the guys, does that mean you can't become a girlfriend? What is so wrong about being comfortable with a girl? A lot of my guy friends always complain that they want someone whom they could talk to and who can make them laugh and yet they go out and court girls who they don't really know. Girls who they have to put up a front just to impress. They would rather have a hoity-toity girl than a girl who's knows them and accepts them for their normal selves. They complain about girls who are "maarte" and say that they would like someone "simple".
Let me tell you about how not-so-simple the word simple is. Simple to men is not having makeup BUT when you don't put any makeup on, that's too simple. Simple is not being high maintenance (i.e. not making him spend too much) and yet still not be jologs. Simple is not being too dressy and yet not too homey at the same time. Simple is someone you can hang out and be comfortable with, like an old comfortable shirt, but they don't like wearing an old comfortable shirt to a party. That's how complicated people's definition of simple is.
But going back to my situation. The guy I'm hanging out with is quite alright. I guess our situation is a whole lot better than what it was a couple of weeks ago. He used to tease me that I wasn't a girl and that I was just one of the guys (ho hum! what's new?). But one time he teased me about that and I really felt bad (I think it was during one of our, as I thought, non-romantic but actually romantic dates) and became quiet. He still kept laughing but at the same time he kept on wooing me and telling me "Hey! I'm just kidding." I wore a really sexy dress during our next date. He has never teased me about my being one of the boys since then. He has also been regularly texting and calling me every single day. He updates me with his schedule and lets me know if he will have time for us or not (take note! US, meaning him and me) without me asking. He doesn't even cringe or complain when I call him sweetie and I even hear him refer to me as "dear" on some occassions.
I have no complaints about our situation. Whether we are just hanging out or if we are dating exclusively doesn't bother me. As long as we're having fun, then I'm cool with that. In the back of my mind though, I can't help but wonder, in his eyes, am I still "one of the boys" or has he finally seen the girl in me?
(Read comments)
|
