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“Okay, kunwari hot yung guy, pero average intelligence… tapos…”
“Wait, is he from UP?”
“O sige, pero NCPAG.”
“Ha? Akala ko ba average intelligence?”
“Uy meron naman akong kakilala na NCPAG at average yung intelligence.”

Alright then, back to the hypothetical scenario.

“Hot yung guy na average intelligence, and he tries to be interested in what you like, you know, he tries reading your books…”

Let me cut you right there. Haggard. *Thumbs down. Next!

But there’s no one else. Next! is not an option because there’s no one behind the imaginary boy. Even in hypotheticals you end up single. The next time you find yourself alone, don’t even try to bug the cosmos nor stir up divine forces, you’re the one to blame.