|Current music:||eh something thats playing on mtv2|
By reading my updates one may assume I was a whore/lip slut going after anything with a dick but that’s the furthest from the truth. I’ll be the first to admit I’m probably too friendly --- too flirty and that comes off as “I like you” or something but I don’t mean it to. .:sighs:. Which isn’t an excuse I know.
He thinks I lead him on because we kissed … and then I agreed to go on a date with someone, but it’s not like that … the date wasn’t even a real date in my eyes. It was two friends going to have a good time. Regardless of what it was in the other person’s eyes, it never happened because the guy forgot or whatever.
He thinks I’m held up on a lot of other guys – I’m so not. I have a lot of male friend, yes I do and I care about them a lot … and it may come off as being ‘hung up’ on them but … no..
I didn’t lead him on. I wanted something to happen, and I’d been trying for awhile --- and it finally did … but I was my normal asshole assume-y self and didn’t think it meant a thing to him so I acted completely nonchalant which was probably the worst thing I could possible do because we talked for a little while tonight and from what I could get from it, he did/does like me yet doesn’t think anything would work between us because we’re “too” different. Isn’t different a good thing though? Doesn’t it add interest? He’s busy – yeah I get that, it’s natural in this business. I don’t know I just can’t help thinking the reason he said that was because of my nonchalant I don’t care attitude I had. Which was a complete and utter copout.
I don’t know why I get that attitude I guess – it’s easier then being rejected …
Anyway like I told him I’m not going to sit here and try an persuade him to let something happen because that’s pathetic but I will say I’d like something to .. but that isn’t my decision.
Yeah I know – this was a useless update but guess what? My journal ;]