| Current mood: |  giddy |
| Current music: | Dido - Thank You |
"And I... want to thank you... for giving me the best day of my life..."
Life works in strange ways. It's easy to give up when things get tough, to throw your hands up in defeat and wallow in self pity. That's what I did and I have the past entries to prove it. It's hard to keep up hope after so many obstacles have been shoved your way. I had myself convinced that things wouldn't work out. I believed that I had done something wrong, that it was I who didn't deserve the happiness. But just when you think you know exactly where your life is headed, fate comes along and leads you down an unexpected turn. This time, that turn has been for the better.
I'd never had that instantaneous connection with someone before. All the previous men I've cared for have gained my affection over time. Though some affection grew quicker than others, none were so strong so suddenly. None gave me the sweaty palms and racing heart upon first encounter.
It was strange how it happened, but then again, maybe it happened how it was supposed to. I wasn't looking for it, at least not with him, but it found me anyway. I commented him not for selfish self interest, but because I felt his pain through his entry. It touched me because I was feeling the same way he was. I liked the idea of starting a friendship with someone who was going through so similar an experience.
He IMed me to thank me for my empathy and we began to talk. From there the similarities between us stretched from merely the experiencing of similar situations, to the common love of Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie ice cream, to our similar taste in music, and to our corresponding views on various ideas/situations/thoughts. We both mentioned that we hadn't gotten out of the house recently, and I hesitantly invited him over. I still wasn't feeling great, and I feared that I'd be bad company.
But seeing him at my front door a little while later gave me all the proof I needed that I had done the right thing. I had no regrets about inviting him over because I knew at that moment that he was someone who was going to help me get through my most current obstacle. I don't know how I knew, but I did.
And I was right. We laughed, joked, ate, and as the afternoon and evening progressed, I felt myself completely at ease with this new friend who so quickly was showing me a side of myself I thought I had lost forever.
He understands me better than anyone I've ever met. I feel like he knows what I'm thinking almost as quickly as I do. His caring eyes, tender voice and sincere words convince me that everything he says, he means. I like not having to guess with him. He says what he feels, just like I do. Then again, he does a lot of things like I do. He's that missing part of me that I've been searching so long for.
Now I know what people mean when they say that it is not until your darkest moment that the brightest light will shine. And for once, I'm not worried about what tomorrow holds, because I know that he'll be there beside me every step of the way.
~Jordana
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