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okay kids, it's time to laugh and giggle and show how mature we all are...
today was the friday before vacation so, needless to say, school was a joke. in degeorge's class i got 13 extra credit points because i figured out this brain teaser w/ a suit of cards. i rocked it, so i helped kristen figure it out (shhhh!) because she was really freaking out that she couldn’t get it. anyway, that's the not point of this entry. the point of this entry is to share with you all how completely sick my english class is. mrs. lord has us do this thing where everyone has a piece of paper and there was a series of 10 questions that made up a story. everyone would write one sentence and then pass their paper to the person sitting to their left. so on an so forth until all 10 questions were answered. are you seeing the potential for complete and utter hilarity? well if you’re not, here is the final outcome of two of the class stories:
this one i started. then it went from peter lento, mat milliken, brian pham, tim ward, ashley phillips, steve-o, kristen deminico, kizzle, & meg mcclorey
translation if u cant read the picture :
It’s 11:27 in england on a busy street. Matt Milliken was skipping down the sidewalk with a lollipop in hand, then a man in a trench coat named Peter Lento walked up to him and offered the young lad some “candy” and “a good time”. Matt got excited and chased pete. pete called back “follow me to Never Never Land” and matthew followed excitedly. matt said “wait, im not supposed to go with strangers, and you’re pretty strange”. Then peter
punched matt in the face and started running away. matt yelled “come back, i want candy and a good time!”. peter replied “okay”. Holding hands the two boys frolicked into a dark alley ((thank you kyle for starting the erotic-ness)). The next morning the two were seen emerging from the alley all smiles and giddy. The candy was gone and their clothes were disheveled. matt said “wow, i should take candy from strangers, that was a good time.” ((and meg for finishing it))
now...brace yourselves...this was the work of almost all of the GIRLS in the class. it went tim ward, ashley phillips, steve-o, kristen d, kyle, megan m, liz sheerin, jenna larsson, kristen finlay, & molly giesler. hahaha oh man....
translation:
It is 2069 and they are sitting in a tea cup. A scientist who invented a shrinking machine is taking a break from his research. A dashingly handsome FBI agent named Tim Ward showed up to sit in the tea cup. Tim accidently knocked over the shrinking machine and broke it which angered the scientist. The scientist, absolutely furious, punches tim in the face. The scientist then realizes that he punches the tim ward and says “ill forgive you if u
have my babies.” Suddenly the clothes came flying off and the two engaged in porn style hott wet sex. “maybe we can salvage the shrinking machine after out party.” tim suggested. “I’m thinking this will take some time” said the scientist. The two men began to have a wild dance party and smashed every teacup in sight. Pretty son the two looked down at themselves and realized the shrinking machine works much too well :-0. oh no! its out of control! the two are now both one-inch-wonders!
i would like to say that i had absolutely nothing to do with these.
now that we have that clear, when we read them in class mrs. lord was cracking up!! i had my mom read them
and she was so shocked. hahahahahhaha i got great amusement out of her shock. especially when i told her that the “porn style hott wet sex” part was by liz sheerin whos mom is a 1st grade teacher at my brother’s school. she couldn’t decided whether to laugh or not, but after a while she was cracking up too. then she was like “i thought you were supposed to be the good kids” and i was like yeah mom, we are, that’s the scary part.
... let’s hear it for some quality work by a sophomore honors english class!
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