| Current mood: |  numb |
| Current music: | ice queen - within temptation |
everything's plastic, we're all going to die anyway; so what does it matter?
I haven't cut or gotten high in over half a year. More than that. A year since I've cut. I miss it terribly. It's hard to contain myself with what's going on.
I have not talked to Glenn in a long while. I guess that friendship ended?I try to talk to others. But I just feel numb towards them. Nobody knows about this journal just me, and you if you've randomly stumbled upon it ... so hi to you ...
I need to find my iron pills. I've gotten two new bruises from nowhere.
I am tired of being alone, of being hurt, and of hurting others. It's as if my life is a downward spiral ...
Obsolete is the best album ever o_O If you read the lyric booklet then listen to the cd ... it's as if you're watching the movie and anytime you hear a song by itself you've just fast-forwarded to that part ... it is amazing ... I can not explicate how amazing it is.
Descent - Fear Factory
Falling victim from neglect
Designed thoughts and intellect
Forgotten and displaced
The crux of my dismay
I feel nothing
I am nothing
I feel nothing
Nothing
How deep I descend?
Until I reach my end?
How deep I descend?
Deeper into this abyss
Weighted down and sinking fast
Life did not offer me
More than false destiny
I feel nothing
I am nothing
I feel nothing
Nothing
How deep I descend?
Until I reach my end?
How deep I descend?
I am nothing
I feel nothing
I am nothing
I feel nothing
Nothing
Nothing . . .
How deep I descend?
Until I reach my end?
How deep I descend?
.................................................
I've been online for what seems to be an hour. No one has talked to me .Trying to suffice my loneliness with internet isn't even working these days. I know I have trust issues. But why shouldn't I? Everytime I let someone in. I get hurt. I have no one. >_< I just remembered I haven't finished reading my sandman comic. Something to look forward to. Simple things bring me great pleasure. I have decided I will no longer take pictures if I ever smile. Only simple pictures of my face. That is all. That is all there will ever be from now on.
I really don't understand Russell. My panic attacks are more frequent. I can't even leave my room sometimes.
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