| Current mood: |  confused |
| Current music: | knocking on heavens door~avril lavign :p |
feel like im knocking on heavens door
How many special people change?
I’m feeling incessantly melancholy, sporadically pleased,
missing in thought and lacking in consideration.
Hoping and waiting looking for these pieces,
you scattered them in the park.
You helped me to this platform
then slipped away and left me pitiful and broken.
Falling fast face first down into a constantly scrutinized flaw.
Holding the weight of your words in my jaw.
Every time we stand awake
every time I crumble for your sake
I realize that I hate the strain you hold me in.
I can’t stand the way you play with me between your fingers
captured in unbreakable glass.
My only bliss lies in your mind.
Now the conversation is spent.
Not a dime has been repaid
on this carpet, I sit, afraid
Are you ever singled out?
Have you ever felt the isolation of difficulty?
No one to confide in with my deepest thoughts
without misplacing my clumsily fired shots.
Keeping me alive are the glares that aren’t shared very much,
keeping me awake is the sting of your touch.
So you come in and throw your bags down
this must be when you pack up and go.
My ecstasy is slowly creeping by
I can remember foggy dark nights what did they mean to you?
Defend and confine me. This time 11 o’clock.
Momentary infatuation settles in,
and you’re off on one more new whim.
There’s no stopping you now this is out of my hands.
I don’t mind you coming here your wasting all my time.
When you look inside my thoughts and tear each one apart
tears form in the ducts of my eyes and I appreciate when you shake my broken heart.
The twinkle in my depression
Makes your laughter dismal.
The only thing that pours out more then the clouds
Are my wrists when my pain allows.
I feel so vulnerable when everyone stares
I can’t handle anymore of they’re ludicrous lies.
I dig deep into my pillow pushing down inside
it’s the only way to conceal my pain.
Push it down away from the exterior of this 4 walled room.
Upside down eyes to my lids staring out.
Toppled over and falling down, lying down
I see the pieces hit the ground.
Alongside my profile you lay quiet and submissive
all I need to know. Is there something that I’ll be missing?
We would hide the passing of our emotional state.
Hold on to the relationship now, its way too late.
We have not one spoken feeling.
Quoting ourselves and repeating mistakes
contradicting broken promises.
Just deny the illumination I brought into your dejected world!
Hold onto the coil ring of truthless bruises you’ve left behind.
While im up above you…
Sitting on the carpeted platform high away from your world
Reminisce on these words:
Keeping me alive is the highness of myself.
Keeping me awake are the bright eyes you see.
It is.
Its not what you did.
Its what I didn’t.
It not that the worlds a mess.
Its just that we live in piles of pollution and despair everyday.
Its not what I did.
Its not what you didn’t.
Its not that the worlds a war and were all fighting in the front lines.
Its just that the lack of peace is holding us prisoner and forcing us to struggle against the human race.
Its not what they did.
Its not what we didn’t.
Its not that the world isn’t beautiful.
Its just that we fail to see the tranquil moments of stunning excellence that surround us everyday.
Its not what we did.
Its not what they didn’t.
Its not that the world isn’t free.
Its just that we are all slaves held to our comsuming, goal oriented lives.
Our world is an illusion we paint for ourselves.
Day by day
I’m lying on the grass outside at 2 a.m.
You’re lying in the trenches fighting a suspicious war.
In the peace that surrounds me I find comfort and subsequent to that I sleep.
In the gun shots that devour your only happy thoughts, you find pain and resentment.
I wake up in the sunrise and take it in moment by moment.
You wake up in the hospital 10 months subsequent to being shot, in a pointless battle of power.
I enjoy my freedom. I stare bewildered at the beauty of the sky.
You enjoy your deportment back home, to your family.
You fought for freedom and now I enjoy it.
Regretful apology
I’m sorry that I didn’t see just what was going on.
I’m sorry that I sat blindly and waited for someone else.
I’m sorry for being numb and not enduring the pain for the people who suffer.
I’m sorry I never tried to find a solution to the world’s misery.
But most of all I’m sorry for being apart of it all.
Lost everything to you…
there's so much on my mind
so much left to find
so many undone buttons
so many left behind
to much summer to count the stars
and the green is fading no longer ours
the badness of our thinking is taking all control
the blood that stains my carpet is burrowing a new hole
your skin is light. Dark are your eyes
I look in their reflection and I see discrete lies
(Read comments)
|
